Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: My Lifedots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: jackz
    ASL Info:    24/F/OH
    Elite Ratio:    3.76 - 591/622/378
    Words: 187
    Class/Type: Deep Thought/Serious
    Total Views: 630
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1354



    Description:
       shrug... I don't know anymore


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsMy Lifedots
    -------------------------------------------


    Your life twisted up into one story
    Then onto the next...

    Hold up!

    We've still got more in store for you..
    Don't slip up now

    You could just loose it all.

    And what is "all" you ask?

    All of what you've worked so hard for..
    The name you try so dam hard to stand up to..

    That image you want to be seen as..
    yet your life ... my life

    Just another simple story..
    Waiting to be told..

    All that awaits is ears that will actually listen..
    People who actually care..

    For its not the pain that as me sitting in front of my desk top computer

    Its not these tears that have me cry out so hard at night

    Its the silence that gets to me..
    The echoing
    of the keys as I am typing..

    The consistency of it.. of it all...


    "Trying so dam hard...".

    Yet ending up back where I started...





    Submitted on 2009-07-26 13:54:05     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      I really connected with this poem. I really get the part about ending back up where you started, it's a very real statement. good job and thanks.
    | Posted on 2009-07-27 00:00:00 | by JakeHawk | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    176905

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    (Untitled Song) written by TeslaKoyal
    Keep written by TheStillSilence
    Beauty Rest written by jackz
    Twin Intercept written by Daniel Barlow
    no sky on the other side written by teika5
    Coversheets written by TheStillSilence
    Lie back & tan written by Daniel Barlow
    Ciggarettes written by Poetic_tragedy6
    FamiliarDemons ©™ written by kyserin
    Dream written by closetpoet
    Hyle written by endlessgame23
    Mystery Read written by kyserin
    When Sirens Whisper written by HisNameIsNoMore
    The World written by jjd
    A Thousand Reflections written by endlessgame23
    // Seasonal Song written by ShadowParadox
    Night- time written by Daniel Barlow
    Honeymoon written by TheStillSilence
    untitled written by Outlaw
    Loop-di-Loop written by endlessgame23
    Day 6 written by TheStillSilence
    In a Corner written by jeniecel
    Live In Between written by teika5
    Sword in the Water written by Wolfwatching
    Compartments written by TheStillSilence
    Things They (Don't) Say written by TheStillSilence
    A Worsening Effect written by Daniel Barlow
    None the Wiser written by endlessgame23
    Starseed written by endlessgame23
    To the Artist written by HisNameIsNoMore

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry