My spine is cracked from old age,
I have torn another tattered page.
My words are worn and dimly faded,
But quietly for you I have waited.
My voice and purpose are still crystal clear.
Forever, I will love you dear.
| The idea of this particular poem I believe is a great starting place. |
However the doctor suess rhyming at the end of every rhyme made it feel incomplete and a little like a child wrote it. When you write something it doesn't always have to rhyme; I've learned that something can sound just as good or better in free verse.
I'm not saying its bad but it could better, great start though!
|| Posted on 2009-07-30 00:00:00 | by BlueTorcher | [ Reply to This ] |