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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: hopelessly hopefuldots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: silent_death12
    Elite Ratio:    7.94 - 1739/805/135
    Words: 81
    Class/Type: Poetry/Sorry
    Total Views: 788
    Average Vote:    4.0000
    Bytes: 578



    Description:
       [I like to think I'm clever.] [[all apologies]]


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotshopelessly hopefuldots
    -------------------------------------------


    hate breeds hate
    and faith is rare.
    need breeds hope-
    but life isn't fair.

    endless cries masked by
    a thousand flawless fakes.
    always hardest to forgive
    the purest little mistakes.
    remembering how to hate;
    still forgetting how to live.

    Don't yet need your answers,
    the questions still suffice.
    no longer trying to pretend,
    that you're really alive.
    hate breeds hate-
    but you knew that,
    lost your hope
    now what do you have?




    Submitted on 2009-07-28 20:05:46     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      if you're clever, than I'm attractive!...;)...:D Fine, so you're clever! but this almost seems like theres an absence of hope, even though thats the only thing that keeps you hanging on. I'm glad you've begun writing again, your pages have been baren of new material, and your new material shows growth and yet remanisent of words and portraits conveyed b4. "hate breeds hate" not original, but neither are chocolate chip cookies, and they're hard to not like, much like this. Reach further, dig deaper, and remember, your biggest flaws are you're undeveloped skills!
    | Posted on 2009-08-02 00:00:00 | by dismentled | [ Reply to This ]
      I agree completely with andrea....my fav. line was: remembering how to hate; still forgetting how to live....that really spoke to me...we all know how to hate someone ;but we can't get to where we want in life what we want to do what makes us happy but we always have that hate...and to the question at the end of your poem is hate..regret...that what we have... but it was very interesting to read i enjoyed this very much...keep writing it was beautiful
    ~taintedsmiles
    | Posted on 2009-07-30 00:00:00 | by taintedsmiles | [ Reply to This ]
      I agree... you are clever...

    I really enjoyed reading your piece. I feel like that sometimes hopelessly hopeful. Your poem was very interesting I love this line

    "hate breeds hate
    and faith is rare.
    need breeds hope-
    but life isnt fair."

    It flowed really well and it stated its point without being wordy. Your writing here is very vivid, alive and creative.

    I loved "a thousand flawless fakes", "purest little mistakes"... I wonder what kind of mistake is pure, what makes a mistake pure...

    Your poem really make me think about what you were saying and especially how you were saying. It was meticulous, careful but subtle.

    "the questions still suffice" I like that... nice ... a constant thought... kinda like saying what you provide, what I have is enough for now..

    good writing...


    Andrea
    | Posted on 2009-07-28 00:00:00 | by ladydeathstrike | [ Reply to This ]


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