hopeful, yes? nods. of course by meoww

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Submission Name: hopeful, yes? nods. of course dots

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Author:	meoww
Elite Ratio:	6.75 - 262/258/143
Words:	61

Class/Type:	Misc/Misc
Total Views:	91
Average Vote:	No vote yet.
Bytes:	441

Description:

hopeful, yes? nods. of course dots

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a vista unchecked because otherwordly should exist
beyond mountaintops desirous of more than fortune

and distilled joy. this is violet commotion, the angle
of shoulders rubbed raw; silent and still, the broken

chill of winter departing: blossoms, kisses, unearthly
wishes, circles upon water and stone. hosanna,

the crush of fingers aching for empty to know.

Submitted on 2009-08-21 05:17:34 Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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1: >_<
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||| Comments |||
  I'm torn about that comma after 'vista'. Doesn't seem right, but then again I'm lame like that, aren't I?

This was in your journal, right? I remember reading it and it reminded me of something but I couldn't really place what. I'm not sure if you've ever had that feeling, but it's kinda like deja vu.

I get that a lot. I try not to look into it too much.

This is the pursuit of....the pursuit...of...the pursuit...it's endless, like seasons rotating and changing. The way you list worldly and unworldly things displays this beautifully and it is full of hope, full of restlessness and aching. It's sensual, but somehow grounded in its romantic notions.

Actually, I'm captivated by it. I should have just typed that instead of attempting to describe why.
| Posted on 2009-08-23 00:00:00 | by Lady of Shalott | [ Reply to This ]
  This is deep, definitely needs another read! I love it, your choice of words are impeccable and do this piece just.
| Posted on 2009-08-21 00:00:00 | by Clayman | [ Reply to This ]
  This perfectly captures that essence of spring fever, when you're staring out of the window and just aching but you can't put your finger on "why".... blood stirring, angst-rising undercurrents of restlessness, and longing for something new and unknown....

the crush of fingers aching for empty to know.

Exactly! Oh you nailed it with that line! I also love "violet commotion"... it reminds me of the little purple flowers that burst through all those sand pebbles and dirt clods to rise up out of the ground, regardless, each frozen spring.

I'm always jazzed to find good writing... so nice to read you!
| Posted on 2009-08-21 00:00:00 | by Runes | [ Reply to This ]

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