Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Beating Heartdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Clayman
    ASL Info:    28 - getting late
    Elite Ratio:    6.34 - 609/327/167
    Words: 224
    Class/Type: Poetry/
    Total Views: 544
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1361



    Description:
       My views expressed towards men beating women.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsBeating Heartdots
    -------------------------------------------


    Hey there Mr. Big man, you sad little fuck.
    You dare play this game again- wanna push your luck?
    I should've known then no change would be seen.
    You like to fake the man but i know you taint the queen.
    Now everyone will see your soul is cracked and not so pristine.
    So you like to take and break the beautiful mind?
    Now it is you that will break and lose everything Mr. Blind.

    You love living without consequence?
    Little man life's got no pardons.
    You gloat in strife with secret malevolence.
    Your every move in life breathes incompetence.
    Many hard lessons left for you in this existence.
    Maybe i'm here to teach you there's no second chances.
    Maybe i'm just here to hate you, here to plan your demise?

    Twisted games forming treason in disgrace.
    Your fists - salvation, the damned - her face.
    I see you're at full beat filling your defiled need.
    Now i will teach you Mr. Pain, what it is to bleed.
    Sadly once the lesson is learnt the chance is burnt.
    Love punched to pieces by the self cannot be returned.

    I hope this is what you wanted.
    I hope this is what you had in mind.
    No woe to be recanted.
    No way to push rewind.

    -Svw




    Submitted on 2009-08-21 08:04:04     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Wow!!!!! So wonderfully put. Reminds me of my Half sister we are not close and it reminds me of how she is and the way that she has acted in the past.
    But we dont talk any more I had to get a restraining order on her..
    Shes that bad. Anyway I really like the poem.

    Keep it up And remember that you are a gift.

    Totojane
    | Posted on 2009-08-22 00:00:00 | by totojane03 | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    177590

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry