[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: gonedots

    Author: totojane03
    ASL Info:    25- colorado springs
    Elite Ratio:    3.95 - 151/77/35
    Words: 70
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 455
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 426


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.


    The clock tics like the sand in an hour glass,
    That just lets time slip away,
    And memories to faded like roses that slowly die, or like wet tears that easly get wiped away, And have no say,
    The petals blow in the wind,
    There such light weight,
    There breath taken away,
    Blown like dirt,
    Not remembered when they are gone,
    Its importance fade like lyrics from an old song.

    Submitted on 2009-08-24 16:00:20     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      Wow......Such powerfull words Greatly apprciated.I thought about writing it differently but it didnt sound right at the time.
    I thought something was missing though couldn't place it...
    Glad that you enjoyed this piece.....

    | Posted on 2009-08-25 00:00:00 | by totojane03 | [ Reply to This ]
      Interesting topic and very well described here, every line is a message in its own that carries a powerful meaning, i really enjoyed this piece and think its quite well laid out although i would have used stanzas to break it down into separate ideas but im not too sure if this would have been the right approach. The whole piece is rather short and straightforward and it doesnt beat around the bush. I think this is some of your better writing here and you should expand on this style. I enjoyed it. Thanks.
    | Posted on 2009-08-25 00:00:00 | by Clayman | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Alone in the Crowd written by SavedDragon
    Fasade written by jackz
    Summer written by layDsayD
    Neither Here nor There written by layDsayD
    I will call out your name written by RisingSon
    Linger written by saartha
    Bee Keeper written by endlessgame23
    Once Again written by krs3332003
    Happy Saint Patrick's Day written by poetotoe
    Every..... written by jackz
    Whiteout written by layDsayD
    Dashboard Light written by layDsayD
    Before, Now, & After written by SincerWritinAsh
    The Song on Your Guitar written by SavedDragon
    Sunset written by rev.jpfadeproof
    written by Daniel Barlow
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (final) written by endlessgame23
    Push written by JanePlane
    Still Fighting See? written by ForgottenGraves
    written by Daniel Barlow
    The Severed Head written by HisNameIsNoMore
    descent written by TheBadSadMan
    World I No Longer Want written by ForgottenGraves
    Or are we written in the sand? written by Chelebel
    Brigit written by endlessgame23
    Waiting written by Daniel Barlow
    102.3 written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Devils in the Details written by endlessgame23
    PEARL (Exclusive Poem) 10th Anniversary... written by Cordell
    Primitive Lapse written by Crestfallenman




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]