[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: The Drowning Mermandots

    Author: jezracrow
    ASL Info:    90+/F/Witness Relocation
    Elite Ratio:    6.52 - 10/6/4
    Words: 125
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 722
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 824


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsThe Drowning Mermandots

    I remember Mexico without you,
    a rain-scented suitcase of cotton lies
    tossed overboard in deep waters,
    your watch and handgun later traded
    for a bag of red mangoes and fresh sandals
    on shady back roads behind Tapa's Bar
    near that lonely beach in Costa Maya.

    I became a summer stray, roaming the island
    with wild dogs and curious children, an oddity
    spotted by waving fishermen on teal mornings
    before the next boat sailing to Guardalavaca
    finally came. I remember Cuba without you,
    a new sundress with cash from your wallet
    before I kissed the oiled black leather
    and threw that last piece of you away.

    Adios, amor, gracias por la nueva ropa y el paseo libre...
    lastima que no sabía nadar.

    Submitted on 2009-08-28 14:22:45     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      this makes me ache so much. the images you conjure, so bittersweet - yet, by not tasting those memories, how can life ever be complete?

    beautiful, beautiful piece.
    | Posted on 2009-09-04 00:00:00 | by meoww | [ Reply to This ]
      Oh, apart from being impertinent (below), I want to tell you that I like your free verse a lot, a lot. I just go by how it sounds, not by what it means; and this verse sounds so good, I think you must be good at it.
    | Posted on 2009-08-30 00:00:00 | by Glen Bowman | [ Reply to This ]
      I theenk you needing a new woman, my friend?
    | Posted on 2009-08-30 00:00:00 | by Glen Bowman | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Break Up written by WriteSomething
    Wavelength written by saartha
    In the end written by Janesaddiction
    102.3 written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Summer Nights written by ollie_wicked
    The Promise written by annie0888
    Wasps written by Wolfwatching
    A Sonnet for Nina written by SavedDragon
    In the Mouth of Elysium written by HisNameIsNoMore
    In My Head written by faideddarkness
    May 31 2018 written by Chelebel
    Date night written by expiring_touch
    You Make Me speechless written by elephantasia
    Sunset written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Our Cinder Crisis written by SavedDragon
    Transparent written by Daniel Barlow
    cleverly shunned written by CrypticBard
    It's been a while written by Sharati_hottie
    Wish written by Daniel Barlow
    Love Can Be... written by HAVENSMITH92
    Ten Poems written by Wolfwatching
    The Song on Your Guitar written by SavedDragon
    One Thing written by Wolfwatching
    Hopelessly Blind written by ForgottenGraves
    Be Free written by hybridsongwrite
    Devils in the Details written by endlessgame23
    Incubus written by monad
    Red Barn written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Giving written by jjd
    new moon written by CrypticBard




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]