Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: colddots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Dark Dann
    ASL Info:    18/ Male/ San Diego
    Elite Ratio:    6.44 - 78/67/53
    Words: 114
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 509
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 744



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotscolddots
    -------------------------------------------


    Come on, take a step closer
    I will be your martyr.
    Can you see the blood trails,
    Hidding away the details.
    Going through my broken skin,
    cursing me from within.


    (Why)
    Did you leave me here?
    (try)
    To find you near
    (cold)
    I feel so dead, inside my fears.

    Hold on another second
    I feel so alone
    Can you feel my heart beat?
    all the way through my chest
    It calls, For you name
    It begs to hear your voice

    But you seem so far away.
    are you even in here?

    (why)
    Did you leave me here?
    (try)
    to find you near
    (fall)
    Into a lake of my tears




    Submitted on 2009-09-04 00:43:38     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Wow, you are way deep. If like I suspect and you are writing from real life experience, I can really relate. I hope in that case you are the pick yourself up and try again type. I believe you are. 90% of my writiing comes from something bad, so writing is my therapy.
    At the end of the day I wouldn't change a
    thing, they make me the character I am.
    I love being me, even when I'm a mess!
    Thanks for your comments on Lady In White.
    Keep living, keep writing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    Love,Peace&Craziness
    Mistie kidd
    | Posted on 2010-03-31 00:00:00 | by mistiekidd | [ Reply to This ]
      this sounds to me like a pretty emotional piece,i would imagine whoever or whatever it is about the subject meant quite a bit to you...it just sounds like that type of piece...i can definitly say i felt the longing...and by the way,thanks for your words on "untitled"....crazy...
    | Posted on 2010-03-29 00:00:00 | by crazyphreshone | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    178115

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    (Untitled Song) written by TeslaKoyal
    None the Wiser written by endlessgame23
    Dream written by closetpoet
    The World written by jjd
    Live In Between written by teika5
    a leaf of shadow and edge written by Daniel Barlow
    Florida's Autumn Solstice written by closetpoet
    The Want written by Daniel Barlow
    Untitled written by Daniel Barlow
    Loop-di-Loop written by endlessgame23
    Coversheets written by TheStillSilence
    When Sirens Whisper written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Johnny's Cock written by endlessgame23
    A Worsening Effect written by Daniel Barlow
    // Seasonal Song written by ShadowParadox
    Twin Intercept written by Daniel Barlow
    Not the Devil, but the Wind written by endlessgame23
    Sword in the Water written by Wolfwatching
    Delicious Stews written by elephantasia
    A bit of Pain written by teika5
    going,,,"Skin." written by teika5
    no sky on the other side written by teika5
    Verse: written by Daniel Barlow
    The Curtain Call written by faideddarkness
    FamiliarDemons ©™ written by kyserin
    The Human Harmonic written by Daniel Barlow
    Gaia written by endlessgame23
    Hyle written by endlessgame23
    The Abyss of Love written by poetotoe
    Things They (Don't) Say written by TheStillSilence

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry