With every careful crossing in our path
satan secretly tries to inflict his wrath.
With all his evil callous cunning ways
He tries to taint and destroy all our days..
His blaspheming being will make you run.
he is created to hurl hate just for fun.
He follows one gleaning instruction:
to make of your life great destruction..
Sometimes he will make you a sure winner
to cleverly create from you a sly sinner..
For when you are the vile vessel of sins
he will cunningly be the one that wins..
In the end he will lovingly lead you astray
to a place that burns all your flesh away..
So do not ever dare to stray his way.
Try your best to avoid him every day..
I saw this slightly differently. What I saw was the desire for personification, not social commentary.
You took Satan and made him a character. That's great. I tried the same thing, with a slight twist a while ago. It is a concept he represents, not a being.
Your work is...surgical. I've no better way to explain it. You take a concept, then mold it into poetry. It's brilliant, absolutely brilliant.
We so quickly blame satan for all things that go badly.
Despite my personal beliefs, I enjoyed this. The wording is intelligent, and shows that you have a lot of talent. It flows nicely, though some lines are longer than others.
Some of the words you rhymed were somewhat expected since they're used frequently in poems, but it didn't really take anything away from the piece.
Submission Name: Satan
