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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Settle my Lungsdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Sheakhan
    ASL Info:    22/M/FL
    Elite Ratio:    5.66 - 167/183/82
    Words: 149
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 42
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 852



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsSettle my Lungsdots
    -------------------------------------------


    How do you walk when you just want to run?
    Is it the going that's hard, or the heat of the sun?
    Why do I feel so weary, walking out in the day?
    When the getting is good, I just want to get away.

    I could take flight and ramble, and never return.
    I could take all the fire, and I'd never burn.
    I could breath all the smoke in, and settle my lungs,
    but I'd never stop running, if I set out to run.

    There are some aches and pains that I'll always avoid
    and others more terrible I could never enjoy,
    there are whispers that sting like salt in a sore
    but wordless sighs and writings that hurt even more.

    Is it the going that's hard, or the pace of the trip?
    Is it just the world spinning, or am I getting sick?




    Submitted on 2009-09-12 00:20:57     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      If you never saw that commercial with Elmo and Whoopi Goldberg talking about strangers or something faking crazy like that, then I suggest you should because this poem has some strange similarities. Like the way Elmo asks questions that are so seemingly simple but once you get started with an answer you start draining whatever else is on your mind about it.
    Also makes me feel like you're writing for one of those Depression pamphlets and writing out the symptoms of the condition. There's this one paper that the nurses and counseling office always gives out and it shows some really 60's characters asking questions and making comments about the services and what they provide. Like "I got my first pack of birth control from the Dawson College nurse!" or "I shared a needle... do I have any illness now?" I made up that last one but... overall, this really feels like a factual view of things. Like a semi-personal account of what you're thinking and feeling and what your reactions to it are. It's simple. Simpler than usual Keegan, so I'm not quite sure if you're toying with a new subject or structure, but it doesn't feel very natural.
    | Posted on 2009-09-13 00:00:00 | by JenFlynn | [ Reply to This ]


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