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    dots Submission Name: One red tulipdots

    Author: girly101
    Elite Ratio:    3.79 - 292/310/149
    Words: 90
    Class/Type: Poetry/Longing
    Total Views: 541
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 579

       I might add on to this later, maybe.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsOne red tulipdots

    Long Auburn hair,
    so dark and full.
    Light red lips,
    that hold a seductive pull.

    And your eyes,
    so blue and deep.
    Absent of tears,
    for centuries you've had to weep.

    You close your eyes,
    dont look my way.
    you have no more words for me,
    but so much left to say.

    One red tulip to lie on my bed,
    three last words to race through my head.
    One last kiss before you went,
    three red tears that said what you meant.

    Submitted on 2009-09-17 14:25:35     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      interesting impressions this poem makes...almost more like an abstract painting...
    i especially like the last stanza and the last line...very much.

    | Posted on 2011-03-28 00:00:00 | by jacoberin | [ Reply to This ]
      This is a very powerful poem to be so short, and I don't think it needs anything added to it. You were able to speak volumes in a few short lines, and I think this is very good work. I only saw 2 things... In the 2nd line of the 3rd quatrain, I'm assuming you meant "way"? And then in the very last line of the poem "ment" should be spelled "meant." I'm a stickler for grammar and spelling so forgive me! Anyway, I'm very impressed with this piece.
    | Posted on 2009-09-18 00:00:00 | by black_beauty18 | [ Reply to This ]

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