Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Lonely Stardots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: faideddarkness
    ASL Info:    28 - Male - Idaho
    Elite Ratio:    6.54 - 101/55/50
    Words: 73
    Class/Type: Poetry/Depressed
    Total Views: 861
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 473



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsLonely Stardots
    -------------------------------------------


    This once shining star
    Now is growing cold
    All the walls going dark
    This feeling so old
    Felt the need to compel
    To make others come alive
    But now I just walk
    With no reason to survive

    The warmness I held
    Slowly dwindles away
    And the wind I breathe
    Seem to not want to stay
    This star held inside
    Turning into stone
    No longer glowing
    Sitting all alone




    Submitted on 2009-09-23 00:55:58     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Have you ever seen the watchmen? This reminds me of the character Dr. Manhatten. This poem has an alien feel to it. This person is an outcast just wishing to be held, if only for a little while.
    "To make others come alive."
    From this line, this also could be a religious poem.
    Very interesting and original.
    ~Rachelle
    | Posted on 2009-09-23 00:00:00 | by Priestess | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    178768

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    4th of July written by layDsayD
    What happens written by Wolfwatching
    Summer Nights written by ollie_wicked
    To Glow written by krs3332003
    Once Again written by krs3332003
    102.3 written by rev.jpfadeproof
    The Song on Your Guitar written by SavedDragon
    Sunset written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Trails written by Daniel Barlow
    Date night written by expiring_touch
    untitled written by Chelebel
    Still Fighting See? written by ForgottenGraves
    One Thing written by Wolfwatching
    Wavelength written by saartha
    Munyonyo written by expiring_touch
    Life changes in a moment written by Ramneet
    Song written by Daniel Barlow
    Giving written by jjd
    Neither Here nor There written by layDsayD
    Bee Keeper written by endlessgame23
    To the King written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Pain, an elixir. written by Ramneet
    Hollow Points written by RequiemOfDreams
    Linger written by saartha
    Bond written by saartha
    Summer written by layDsayD
    In My Head written by faideddarkness
    Hopelessly Blind written by ForgottenGraves
    Devils in the Details written by endlessgame23
    cleverly shunned written by CrypticBard

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry