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Hesitation while there’s perspiration
Gratification emits the ultimate gravitation
While the persuasion evoke our imagination
I can’t wait to hale our relation!
Till gestation allows a mutation to our celebration
Each day brings finality to our different situations
Just the thought provides inspiration
The anticipation to our lives current cessation
There’s no complication to this restoration
Just love seeking a companion
Two souls seeking a mate
Hearts awaiting the queue to be together
The time will come and the world better look out!
Inspire the inspired and await the awakening
Vanquish any instability and speak from the heart
Love is the truth while hate is a lie
Tell me you love me until tears fall down my face
If love were a race we end up in a tie every time
| Some of the rhyming employed here is simply shocking. It is SO forced and doesn't even make sense.|
The nations location shuddders with anticipation of my eyes dillation, from alienation.
Masterbation, sallutations, mutilation, annihalation, redemtion, dimension. Elation at the fact you can rhyme words together etc etc.
Those parts took no effort and whilst you probably had a clear meaning in your head, it came out like a load of nonsense.
Try to avoid contradicting yourself, or getting involved with pointless contrasts: "truth/lie".
Some of your lines were okay, I appreciate you may have had a bit of fun writing this, but it's hard to take seriously,
A bit more thought could go a long way.
|| Posted on 2009-09-29 00:00:00 | by Raphael | [ Reply to This ] |