Dear Diary,
Fall has come again,
The leaves fall, and I begin to feel the chill of October as it comes into play. I look back and reflect at every memory that I have had with everyone I was once close to inside of my life, and now I just feel more alone than ever. To tell you the truth, I am just scared. Scared of the failure that plays about in my mere futures, and scared of the things that are going about inside of my life.
I remember the days that I valued life, where fear could never roam, and I could live outside the hells that I create. Trying to own up to my problems, is what I am trying to do, so I can move about this and look back at my moments I have had and say, wow, I survived this pitfall.
A part of me wants to swallow pills again and blank out the day in my full addiction once more, and another part of me, wants to stay in this sober state, move foward, and try to cherish the days that I onced cherished before.
I don't know how many days I have left anymore, I can not be sure, but I want my life to be back to its state I saw it as several months before the mess I have gotten myself inside of.
I want to love and feel loved, and I want to never feel alone inside of this nightmare of anger and hate I have gotten myself inside of.
Please Lord, keep me on this right track. |
Submission Name: Keep Me Going
