Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Kaliedoscopedots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Plegias
    ASL Info:    17/ male/ my house
    Elite Ratio:    3.25 - 37/23/40
    Words: 119
    Class/Type: Poetry/Nostalgia
    Total Views: 506
    Average Vote:    4.5000
    Bytes: 817



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsKaliedoscopedots
    -------------------------------------------


    A simple turn of a knob,
    What do you see?
    Have your sights been robbed?
    What do I mean?
    In the cylinder, panes in a quarrel,
    There is a large Red fighting off Blues,
    The Yellow in personal chattel,
    The Green simply dazed and confuzed.
    The Purple in uproar,
    The Gray most chastised,
    The Black the White abhors,
    The Orange never apprised.
    This mumble- jumble mess of mumbo- jumbo,
    This ignorant mess of something senseless,
    This thing lit by only a flambeau,
    This bold blob of bouyancy apparently dauntless.
    But with the single turn of the screw,
    And with the slip of the thumb,
    The picture becomes something no one can rue,
    The Kaliedoscope becomes an imagination's endless chasm.




    Submitted on 2009-10-27 20:40:44     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Well, y'know, I never thought anything about the mood of it, but reading back I see what you mean...
    | Posted on 2009-10-28 00:00:00 | by Plegias | [ Reply to This ]
      Good job. I love the imagery of the colours. You make it seem really lively, and make the colours stand out. Unlike me, you do pay attention to punctuation, making it an easier read.

    I dont know why, but I cant help but feel sad by this poem. Is that just me?
    | Posted on 2009-10-28 00:00:00 | by LaxGoalie | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    179803

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Coversheets written by TheStillSilence
    untitled written by Outlaw
    A Thousand Reflections written by endlessgame23
    The Abyss of Love written by poetotoe
    None the Wiser written by endlessgame23
    Compartments written by TheStillSilence
    Delicious Stews written by elephantasia
    Untitled written by Daniel Barlow
    Honeymoon written by TheStillSilence
    Snippet written by Daniel Barlow
    Florida's Autumn Solstice written by closetpoet
    a leaf of shadow and edge written by Daniel Barlow
    The Want written by Daniel Barlow
    Mystery Read written by kyserin
    Hyle written by endlessgame23
    Twin Intercept written by Daniel Barlow
    To the Artist written by HisNameIsNoMore
    When Sirens Whisper written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Verse: written by Daniel Barlow
    Relentless. The Visceral Fracture. written by Daniel Barlow
    Starseed written by endlessgame23
    Adoration written by TheStillSilence
    Things They (Don't) Say written by TheStillSilence
    Day 5 written by TheStillSilence
    Rooted in Nature written by Chelebel
    Dream written by closetpoet
    Johnny's Cock written by endlessgame23
    Lost Inside the Race written by ForgottenGraves
    Loop-di-Loop written by endlessgame23
    A bit of Pain written by teika5

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry