Sitting here, staring at my half full glass of scotch, the simple question plagues my mind “Why me? Just two days ago, I was a wealthy, God fearing man with no fears for the future. I saw the future as bright and beautiful, nothing could go wrong. Oh but boy, reality slapped me in the face; no wait, it shot me in my stomach, leaving all the important organs in tact, leaving me to lay there and bleed out like cattle for the slaughter. And this Tuesday of October 29, 1929 , this God forsaken day is the reason for all my despair.” Downing my glass I stand, walking over to my book case, it was a grand book case made of oak and heavily stocked in every book you could think of; my once most prized possessions, will soon be taken away from me, and I will be on the street, to sift through the garbage like rodents!
“I WILL NOT!”
I scream, but my voice just reverberates back at me, the loneliness is now my only friend, for I fear even my sanity has forsaken me. Grabbing my bottle of scotch, I walked out of my study and down the hall. The walls were colored a deep red, and portraits of my ancestors lined the wall. I remember growing up in this house as a young lad, daddy used to tell me the stories of how grandfather had fought in the civil war against slavery, I remember I had always felt so proud of my grandpa for standing up and doing the right thing. Now everything he and my father had worked for was going to be taken from me! Pounding the wall with my fists, I cried.
“I cannot let this happen!”
Panic then struck my heart like a a dagger, “Where was I going to go? What was I going to do? Who would sit in that chair my grandfather made by hand, live in the house he built! The house I was raised in, where I lost my first tooth! The house my mother passed away in!”
“I WILL NOT LET THEM TAKE IT!”
I then run to the end of the hall and into the kitchen and grabbed a piece of firewood from the hearth, “I would rather see my life go up in flames then let them take it!” My heart ached, as I touched the flame to the wall, letting it scorch my grandfathers work, my memories. Everything in life I had once clung to with everything I had is about to go up in flames. Walking down the hall, trailing the flame along the wall as I do, I can feel the heat irritate my skin. As I ascend the staircase I know it will be the last time, still trailing the flame with me. I walk into my bedroom and lay the log and flame on my expensive white carpet, watching it catch fire quickly and spread like a plague. Laying in my bed I close my eyes, letting the flames engulf me, the thought echoing in my mind again and again “they will not take my home, or my life.”
laying there in my bed... “i felt my sorrow consume me, taking me back to when things were simple, I would buy stock and sale it, and sometimes get hit below the belt, but that was okay because I always wound up on the top again. Like hell I was going to move into a dump like a filthy beggar, the thought itself disgusted me to no end. I may have high pride but I would be damned if I let my life be taken from me”
I can feel the flames licking at my skin, closing in around me now, its getting hotter, and the air is getting thinner, I feel as though im holding on my consciences with my finger tips. And I can see it slipping away. Not only will the flames engulf me but my last few moments will be lived inside my head...
then my eyes close and when I open them I am seven years old and in this very room. My mother is on the bead, dying some flue the doctors cant explain.. I walk up to her and hold her hand, even in her darkest hour she managed to be beautiful.
“mama don't leave me...”
“darling I cant help it, but I will always be with you.” she shut her eyes and lightly winced, I could tell it even hurt her when she was speaking.
“baby, promise me you will live every day to its fullest, live like you was never going to see tomorrow, and never take life for granted.”
“i promise mama”
“i love you darling”
“I love you too mama” I said holding her hand still, then something happened... her hand lost grip and slid from mine.. I looked at her, eyes filled with tears and knew she was gone. “MAMA! MAMA! MAAM PLEASE!” I broke into hysterical crying my skin getting hot... to hot! My eyes busted open. “IM IN FIRE!” it burns! My skin feels as though its melting from my very bones, the pain is unbelievable but there is no point in even trying to move now... I am stuck. I try to close my eyes but it hurts to bad, I cannot. I know I only have moments left... and in those final moments I look into the flame and see my mother,her gaze is like needles, saturated with sorrow and disappointment. “mama don't leave me...” the words manage to escape my scorched lips. She she just looked away... then disappeared... realizing what I have now done I try to run but its to late, its ail over... I only have seconds left...
“I'm sorry...” the words cross my lips in bittersweet remorse.
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Submission Name: Black Tuesday
