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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: The Gatedots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: KindredSpirit
    ASL Info:    20, Male, Burlington Iowa
    Elite Ratio:    2.37 - 46/71/90
    Words: 114
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 23
    Average Vote:    3.0000
    Bytes: 772



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsThe Gatedots
    -------------------------------------------


    This unstable combination
    Of ignorance and bliss,
    Is that of which
    You may in fact miss,
    Should you become
    So uncanny in this,
    Its like salt and vinegar
    Mixed with piss.

    The instability of daylight dreams,
    Causes you to learn to tame,
    While one so young
    Would ask you your name,
    Remember one thing,
    This is but a game,
    For those who live exquisitly,
    The one you would maim.

    Little we know,
    Its like world filled with hate.
    We clear our names,
    In hopes of wiping clean the slate.
    Just harvest the truth of reality,
    In terms of a clearer plate.
    So take a step forward,
    And enter through the gate.




    Submitted on 2009-11-02 13:45:42     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      You are such a great poet. I love reading your comments. They make me smile. lol. Thanks. As for this poem. wow. I loved the style. bUt more than loving the style I loved the frist part. It remineded me of the scene from "Sweeny Todd". The scene about Pirelli's Mircale Elixer.
    I loved that scene. But when you mention the part of it being mixed with piss, it just reminded me of that part. just saying. lol:)
    -Rachel:)
    | Posted on 2009-11-03 00:00:00 | by PopRocksRae | [ Reply to This ]
      I think i need a description to know what exactly you're talking about, but from what I've read; gross. The imagery is too crude for my taste, but you convey the message across well, whatever it is you're talking about, i know it's unpleasant. Maybe you could add more to explain what the setting of the poem is.
    | Posted on 2009-11-02 00:00:00 | by arod44 | [ Reply to This ]


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