Spitting Out the Demons by Rubyheart

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Submission Name: Spitting Out the Demons dots

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Author:	Rubyheart
ASL Info:	1_/F & M/Kentucky
Elite Ratio:	4.88 - 5/4/5
Words:	125

Class/Type:	Rant/Being a Teen
Total Views:	24
Average Vote:	4.0000
Bytes:	800

Description:

Spitting Out the Demons dots

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Finally...
Spitting Out the Demons.
A place where my age does not matter
Simply something that we can not control...
Our weakness is life.
And I, am my very own weakness.

Spitting Out the Demons.
All look a like.
From that one familiar stranger...
The one you know the most,
followed by love.

I pity the fool, for I am the fool.
I am the twelve year old girl who acts in their twenties.
The demons, are my very own self.

For this poem serves no purpose.
For me to only type my thoughts.
Dark inside me...
A small burning flame at the back of my mind.
Surely, I am sane.

Spitting Out the Demons...
I envy you, familiar stranger.

Submitted on 2009-11-02 20:31:27 Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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||| Comments |||
Actually, I would echo many of the same words as Sepheroth. I might nearly be old enough to be your mother, so please don't take offense when I say I could tell immediately by your words that you are young. It's OK, because you are. I can relate to your feelings, and I never want to forget what it was like to be a teenager. The biggest reason for this is because my oldest daughter is a near-teenager, and my youngest will be there one day, too. When they are going through the same things I went through, the same things you are going through now, I would like to be able to treat them with understanding rather than condemnation.

Journalling is an excellent way to vent your feelings. Dont' be too hard on yourself if everything doesn't come out perfect. Like Sepheroth says, write what is on your mind and your heart, don't try to change it too much or worry about rhyme, structure, etc. Leave it the way it is, or if you decide to re-write something or take an idea from an earlier poem and expand on it, do keep the original. Keep it to remind yourself of where you've come from and look to it to see where you might want to go. Always back it up somewhere (I learned this hard lesson by losing all my poetry twice, a span worth 18 years,) so you can look back on it as you go.

The writing you do freely, though it might not always have the same structure as something that was planned, has as much, if not more value. Those are your thoughts, in their purest and sincerest form. Among them, you will find hidden jewels; jewels which have been, and can be still, made more beautiful through a a refining process that includes heat, friction, and pressure. People are like jewels, and so is poetry.

soul-hugger
| Posted on 2009-11-05 00:00:00 | by Soul-Hugger | [ Reply to This ]
Ok... I do see your point that this work has no purpose in your mind but yet it does.

Comming from one with many demons himself I to use words in a poetic manner to ease the suffering from within.

Ok an idea you might want to use is compare life, love and war as tey are the same thing I feel if done right you could expose even the demons of your readers as well as your own thus taming your very lie in the process.

Also this seems a little forced try and just let words flow more freely and dont worry about how it sounds just write to what your heart tells you to write.

I hope my thoguhts and one idea helps you in your writing many more pieces and dont et me fighten you with my words.

| Posted on 2009-11-02 00:00:00 | by Sepheroth432 | [ Reply to This ]

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