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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Alone (Work In Progress)dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Iffy
    Elite Ratio:    6.33 - 91/55/41
    Words: 125
    Class/Type: Lyrics/Misc
    Total Views: 25
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 873



    Description:
       I began writing this the night we had to evacuate our home because of the Rocky fires. I haven't had time to finish it, it's only the first verse and chorus.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsAlone (Work In Progress)dots
    -------------------------------------------


    I’m wide awake and
    I’m so afraid
    I’m tossing and turning

    The music plays and
    The fire sways and
    Everything’s burning

    The moon is shining
    Someone is crying
    And I don’t know why
    But the stars… they call out to me

    The silence rumbles
    The ashes tumble
    And I’m left waiting

    And through the night sky
    My shattered thoughts fly
    I’m contemplating

    Through it all I see your face
    The times you laughed to hide your disgrace
    And I
    I’ll never love someone like you

    Chorus:
    Somewhere in the distant sky
    The days grow old, people move on
    And life goes on
    But hidden behind those eyes
    Lies
    The sorrows that you’ve never shown
    And now they’re all alone




    Submitted on 2009-11-03 03:45:54     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      Well i wasnt sure how i felt about this piece at first, i am very sceptical of written lyrics.

    And so i decided to treat it like an unfinished poem, just verses, nothing else.

    These are my favorite lines :

    "And I don’t know why
    But the stars… they call out to me"

    They stood out above the entire piece, special, and they made me think.

    Also i thought the chorus was one of the better verses, expecially the last two lines.

    This piece was good, expecially for a work in progress.

    Well written!
    Channie
    | Posted on 2009-11-03 00:00:00 | by dthforeverpain8 | [ Reply to This ]



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    January 10 07
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