This site will self destruct in 2 months, March 17.
It will come back, and be familiar and at the same time completely different.
All content will be deleted. Backup anything important.
--- Staff
Roleplay Cloud -

Sign up to EliteSkills

Already have an account? Login to Roleplay.Cloud
Forgot password? Recover Password

Knight Light

Author: mojymo
Elite Ratio:    6.43 - 50 /59 /41
Words: 94
Class/Type: Poetry /Misc
Total Views: 1046
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 587


Knight Light

That white light penetrates
the clouds, lighting up
my soul to light the way for my journey.
I shield myself with armor,
boasting of the shine it brings to all.
I am the knight that rescues damsels.
Please believe I mean well though I
fall from my horse and fall
to the ground before the dragon,
slowly licking its lips and eager
to take me down into its belly.

I will catch the light of heaven in my sword
and weighty shield to
protect the lonely damsels and
play the role of God.

Submitted on 2009-11-29 21:35:57     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
Edit post

Rate This Submission

1: >_<
2: I dunno...
3: meh!
4: Pretty cool
5: Wow!


  Its like something batman would write while wasting away in an insane asylum because he ran out of batorangs and couldn't catch up to a sodomizing, womanizing, joker. Sorry for your luck. Perhaps if you wore a paper bag over your head and your partner used a dental dam when descending to your vag, you wouldn't have such unfortunate outcomes.

| Posted on 2009-12-06 00:00:00 | by MyX | [ Reply to This ]
  What is basting? Ive never heard that before, interesting word though hmm. I enjoyed the overall content but i feel you have instilled your current emotions (drained? Demotivated?) somewhat into this.

"like some lantern" this just does not fit for some reason, feels under described or under emphasised or something. I like the rythm but you failed to capture me superbly like in previous works, was this a forced write or am i just falling off the pot here?

Anyways i give it a 7, compared to previous works, a 6.
| Posted on 2009-11-30 00:00:00 | by Clayman | [ Reply to This ]
  This was an interesting write and very funny because it reminds me so much of a piece called Triumph? that I wrote, should check it out because from reading this I think you'd like it. This does seem very short for how much it feels like it wants to say. I enjoyed the mood that this gave off, and the end was a nice touch too. Well, keep it up
| Posted on 2009-11-30 00:00:00 | by bkj43 | [ Reply to This ]

Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

1. Be honest.
2. Try not to give only compliments.
3. How did it make you feel?
4. Why did it make you feel that way?
5. Which parts?
6. What distracted from the piece?
7. What was unclear?
8. What does it remind you of?
9. How could it be improved?
10. What would you have done differently?
11. What was your interpretation of it?
12. Does it feel original?