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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Insomnia by Way of Thoughtdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Gunforhire
    Elite Ratio:    1.57 - 1/5/8
    Words: 149
    Class/Type: Poetry/Depressed
    Total Views: 850
    Average Vote:    4.0000
    Bytes: 870



    Description:
       The title gives it away. I couldn't sleep and nightmares and thoughts kept me up. This went on for about 2 weeks until I wrote this. After that I got my rest again

    Thank you for your time. Hope you enjoyed


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsInsomnia by Way of Thoughtdots
    -------------------------------------------


    The thoughts keep me awake again
    Thoughts of wonderment and despair
    Fueled by love ballads and self-loathing anthems
    they scream to me in silent voices
    Their's is a morbid yet welcomed view
    Enlightening me to the truth
    but bathing in my disgust
    It seems as if by chance they were born
    Though they weren't created out of necessity
    But as a cautionary tale
    Rarely do I heed their warning
    Which leaves me with more and more scars
    and very few victorious speeches
    And yet they do not quit
    They continue to speak
    Babbling on and on about the dreams I wish for
    and the nightmares that come alive
    Yet here I lay tossing and turning
    Still trying to catch what sleep I can
    Provided I pay the thought it's toll...




    Submitted on 2010-01-08 01:18:41     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      I like it, but there are parts where it just doesn't seem to make sense, particularly in the middle.
    It might be grammatical error, or maybe I'm not suppposed to get it, butif someone were born by chance, what would the necessity be in their birth?
    It just stuck out to me as sort of repetitive in a cool way.
    And in the line before, I think there's a word missing >.>
    Or I'm not supposed to get it
    Who's getting bathed "in my disgust?"

    Otherwise, I liked it, very imaginative and abstract, just how I like some poetry
    | Posted on 2010-01-08 00:00:00 | by Tesana | [ Reply to This ]

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

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