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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Signdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Xiallia
    ASL Info:    17-F-Missing Osaka[IL]
    Elite Ratio:    1.49 - 3/23/32
    Words: 496
    Class/Type: Lyrics/Trapped
    Total Views: 435
    Average Vote:    5.0000
    Bytes: 2791



    Description:
       It's a song


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsSigndots
    -------------------------------------------


    Can't breath, it's a Mayday, dot dot dot dot, Heart hurts, it's a Mayday, dot dot dot dot dot
    Time goes Tic toc and flies by Tic Toc. Can you hear my Sign, Sign, dot dot dot dot dot

    dot dot dot dot dot, Please just dot dot dot dot dot look at me for one last time
    I once shined but now I am different. And I couldn't say anything dot dot dot dot dot

    [Rapped:It's me- the one who's crying like a fool
    I'm in the dark room all day and all night and it's not alright
    Why can't you understand my heart
    My heart tightens as time passes]

    My Eyes squeezing tears out
    I am scared that this is the end, so please save me.

    Can't breath, it's a Mayday dot dot dot dot, Heart hurts, it's a Mayday dot dot dot dot dot
    Time goes Tic toc and it flies by Tic Toc Tic Toc. Can you hear my Sign, Sign, dot dot dot dot dot

    dot dot dot dot dot I have a lot to say dot dot dot dot dot so please listen
    And don't pretend you don't know about the day I've lost everything dot dot dot dot dot

    [Rapped:Do you know how I feel and I've confessed countless times
    And the love sign I gave you. Did you get my sign? sign?
    I need you to get back up. Without you I have worry syndrome.
    Don't neglect me, I want you by my side, side]

    Shivering lips and my heart which won't last much
    And I'm too scared that it might stop, so please save me.

    Can't breath, it's a Mayday, dot dot dot dot, Heart hurts, it's a Mayday, dot dot dot dot dot
    Time goes Tic toc and it flies by Tic Toc. Can you hear my Sign, Sign, Don't neglect me, I want you by my side, side

    Shivering lips and my heart which won't last much
    And I'm too scared that it might stop, so please save me.

    Can't breath, it's a Mayday, dot dot dot dot, Heart hurts, it's a Mayday, dot dot dot dot dot
    Time goes Tic toc and it flies by Tic Toc. Can you hear my Sign, Sign, dot dot dot dot dot

    Your memories within me and I hold my breath and endure it.
    Please, you know I will crumble without you

    Can't breath it's a Mayday, dot dot dot dot, Heart hurts it's a Mayday, dot dot dot dot dot
    Time goes Tic toc and it flies by Tic Toc. Can you hear my Sign, Sign, dot dot dot dot dot (Please)

    Can't breath it's a Mayday, dot dot dot dot, Heart hurts it's a Mayday, dot dot dot dot dot
    Time goes Tic toc and it flies by Tic Toc. Can you hear my Sign, Sign, dot dot dot dot dot




    Submitted on 2010-01-08 02:00:47     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      I'm with sweets . ..
    |
    I like the Dot dot dot in parts, in others it seems a inconviance to read it out. The tic-toc really made me want to read more though. Maybe it's jsut my thing for clocks. Anyways. The repeativness of it was good, not too much, not too little. It wasn't something you see every day.

    It was quiet . . .intresting, I think my favirote line was :Can't breath, it's a Mayday dot dot dot dot, Heart hurts, it's a Mayday dot dot dot dot dot : It was more like something I'd want o hear in a song. I loved it!

    Over all, greatness at it's best. Just what I expect of you manna!
    | Posted on 2010-01-08 00:00:00 | by CopperVeins | [ Reply to This ]
      I really like the dot, dot, dots in some places. Like: Can't breathe it's mayday.... That part. But, in other places it's kind of like...say what? Like it seems like it doesn't fit. Man, I say like a lot. My point is, I enjoy the uniqueness the dot, dots provide. They're interesting. And really draw attention, at least, in my opinion.


    "Shivering lips and my heart that won't last much"


    I really like that. Something about the imagery. Sweet agonized. Uh-huh. Kind of reminds me of when you first dive into a lake and it's really cold. When you rise up, your lips are blue and your teeth chatter. Plus, your heart pounds frantically at the frigid shock. You know? Well, yeah, that's what it reminds me of.



    Overall, I'm pretty fond of the song, and would love to hear it actually sung and played. Do you have music to go along with it? Either way, I like it. You really illustrated a maybe common theme in a very unique way. I love uniqueness. Most people do. haha.


    <3
    | Posted on 2010-01-08 00:00:00 | by SweetAndOhSoME | [ Reply to This ]


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    181772

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

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