[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: Road Killdots

    Author: col13x
    Elite Ratio:    2.26 - 119/300/559
    Words: 173
    Class/Type: Poetry/The pain inside
    Total Views: 334
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1138


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsRoad Killdots

    Too often I feel like some kind of hitchhiker
    Waiting for passion, just to pull over

    You with your shoulders pressed
    Your ripped open skirt

    And the vent, pounding, insistent, in my blood

    Standing here with this thirst and dust
    A desert highway, my only direction
    My only destination

    Baking heat
    In the bent and shimmering mirages
    Of my darkest parched

    And the empty plastic cups of unquenched
    Internet love

    A man of gravel
    And melting tarmac
    As I screech on the squealing need for rain

    Promises live in the hearts of cactus
    But for their own delusion
    The impossible spines are made

    To dig inside their irritation, of want

    Sun burnt, by the side of the road
    Cooking with the trash and litter
    On the cavitations of my soul
    The blank white sun beats

    And just one drop of reality
    For me
    Not to be imaginary
    In her kiss

    Submitted on 2010-01-08 19:09:38     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      great lines
    one thing word
    | Posted on 2010-01-13 00:00:00 | by leocrates | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Whiteout written by layDsayD
    102.3 written by rev.jpfadeproof
    written by Daniel Barlow
    Estranged / Shocks written by Daniel Barlow
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (6) written by endlessgame23
    written by Daniel Barlow
    It's Night Now written by RisingSon
    cleverly shunned written by CrypticBard
    Wavelength written by saartha
    World I No Longer Want written by ForgottenGraves
    the living moment written by ShyOne
    Physician, Heal Thyself written by WriteSomething
    More then just goodbye written by faideddarkness
    Devils in the Details written by endlessgame23
    Sunset written by rev.jpfadeproof
    written by Daniel Barlow
    written by Daniel Barlow
    Once Again written by krs3332003
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (5) written by endlessgame23
    Neither Here nor There written by layDsayD
    Brigit written by endlessgame23
    The Severed Head written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Blood Stains Are The Worst written by ForgottenGraves
    Bond written by saartha
    Your Lover written by Cordell
    written by Daniel Barlow
    descent written by TheBadSadMan
    Bee Keeper written by endlessgame23
    4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Cosmic Dreams written by Chelebel




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]