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    dots Submission Name: Scornful memoriesdots

    Author: Dark Dann
    ASL Info:    18/ Male/ San Diego
    Elite Ratio:    6.44 - 78/67/53
    Words: 232
    Class/Type: Poetry/Depressed
    Total Views: 845
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1536

       I've been so lazy to post this. Wrote it two months ago after reading a poem by BC Beneke. Inspired by his work: A tiffany moment.

    This is the edited version since a friend of mine dislikes curse words.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsScornful memoriesdots

    Scornful memories; things we couldn't take
    Look into my eyes; an accidental kiss.
    Left shaken in a memory that was never meant.
    Your white flesh, gleams
    In a pathetic wish of dreams;
    I gaze upon your eyes,
    fingers lost in your hair.
    It all meant nothing, but my mind digresses.
    It meant the world to me!

    As you travel, thousand of miles
    I am shaken in your wake;
    tormented by memories I made
    All I wanted was something I couldn't have,
    All I wanted was....

    Chances are, it'll never happen.
    A romance in the making; it just never started.
    Look into the mirror;
    such a simple reflection;
    The heart still feels the dream
    And it feels ever so real!
    You should have left me dead and gone;
    but yet I still hold on
    Feeling so dead and cold

    Two in an eight billion chance
    The world is a horror;
    forcing us into the very last dance.

    Alright, let's tango!
    But I'll never let you go.
    Lost forever in your arms;
    tormented by what I long....

    Perhaps I should be like you;
    so easy to forget
    Perhaps I should rip these pictures
    Burn them to crisp!
    But as I lie awake,
    All these memories I have to take;
    Cherish, and resent.
    Hate what I love
    Love what I hate
    Ah, what a messed up world this is.

    Submitted on 2010-01-11 14:39:29     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

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    ||| Comments |||
      I do enjoy all of your poetry and writing, Dann, and to go back and look at past work of yours makes me smile. Whether it be from a month or a year back, nearly every time I read your writings I get a sense of what you were feeling at the time when you wrote it.

    And, for some reason, I often get images of the memories that brought on the writing.

    I will always love your way of words; and of course this is always room for improvement for your writing.

    Wonderful poem overall: Happy feelings, distressed and hidden emotions, memories that make even me cringe. It's what I sensed when I read this; which was probably a little too much. But everyone's a critic eh? ^_^ Thanks for reading my critique/compliment/ramble.~

    | Posted on 2010-03-05 00:00:00 | by xAngeliquex | [ Reply to This ]
      Hm. A lot of your poetry has a familar ring to it. What I think would really help...is to just step out, take an emotion that is purely yours and capture it. Don't tame it. God knows I try to overtame my writings. Just let it go, and where it ends up...that's what it should be.

    Ho hum.

    But, that's just me rambling with nonsense.

    I think I've seen this piece on your Myspace. Possibly. As I did then, I like it now. Nice write, Pillow.
    | Posted on 2010-01-11 00:00:00 | by SweetAndOhSoME | [ Reply to This ]

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    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

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