Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Imaginationdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: daughterofdeath
    ASL Info:    23/Female/West Virginia
    Elite Ratio:    4.68 - 277/293/232
    Words: 115
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 754
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 774



    Description:
       G.D.A


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsImaginationdots
    -------------------------------------------


    I had a dream last night
    of the most beautiful thing.
    Long black wavy hair,
    caramel skin, dark brown eyes,
    so dark they were almost black.
    But they had a shine in them
    as they locked into mine.
    Dimples in each cheek
    as that big smile appeared.
    I ran my hand through that
    beautiful black hair,
    and hugged them close.
    No, this was not a dream of you,
    at least not exactly.
    She looks exactly like you,
    and calls me mom.
    She's the most beautiful thing
    I've ever laid eyes on.
    But I've never seen her,
    not in reality at least.
    I never met her,
    talked to her.
    She's just a figment
    of my imagination.




    Submitted on 2010-01-13 20:18:06     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      I don't know what it is with this poem, but every time I read it, a shiver goes down my spine. It seems so simply put, words carelessly thrown together, but you must've been having some sort of epiphany when you did. O_O

    I really like it. I can completely imagine the unborn possibility and the discovery of an unknown love and life, at the same time a future inside a person.

    She looks exactly like you,
    and calls me mom.
    She's the most beautiful thing
    I've ever laid eyes on.

    I think this is the best part in it ... the ending was a little meh ... but that part says so much in just a few words.
    :)
    | Posted on 2010-01-26 00:00:00 | by Urisen | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    181948

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Deep written by Janesaddiction
    // Seasonal Song written by ShadowParadox
    (Untitled Song) written by TeslaKoyal
    Compartments written by TheStillSilence
    Gaia written by endlessgame23
    Dream written by closetpoet
    Relentless. The Visceral Fracture. written by Daniel Barlow
    Twin Intercept written by Daniel Barlow
    Coversheets written by TheStillSilence
    The Curtain Call written by faideddarkness
    When Sirens Whisper written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Starseed written by endlessgame23
    no sky on the other side written by teika5
    A bit of Pain written by teika5
    The World written by jjd
    FamiliarDemons ©™ written by kyserin
    A Worsening Effect written by Daniel Barlow
    Things They (Don't) Say written by TheStillSilence
    Sword in the Water written by Wolfwatching
    going,,,"Skin." written by teika5
    Johnny's Cock written by endlessgame23
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth written by endlessgame23
    a leaf of shadow and edge written by Daniel Barlow
    Florida's Autumn Solstice written by closetpoet
    Lie back & tan written by Daniel Barlow
    Live In Between written by teika5
    Whispered written by endlessgame23
    In a Corner written by jeniecel
    The Want written by Daniel Barlow
    To the Artist written by HisNameIsNoMore

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry