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    dots Submission Name: Tiptoeing on the Edgedots

    Author: smexybabe0101
    Elite Ratio:    2.84 - 25/31/66
    Words: 119
    Class/Type: Poetry/Venting
    Total Views: 565
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 791


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsTiptoeing on the Edgedots

    Your words pour into my ear,
    Echo around my brain,
    Slash away at my skin,
    Carve themselves in my memory.

    Shoving me closer,
    And closer to the edge.
    Pushing me further,
    Until I crack, until I breakdown.

    You know what makes me tick,
    But I canít help but get worked up,
    I shriek and weep,
    Until I canít anymore.

    Your lies, and behaviour,
    Donít prevent me from seeing who you really are,
    Just a self-centred girl, that loves to make people snap,
    To make herself feel better about her fears,
    Her uncertainties, her suspicions, her existence.

    One day you will comprehend how far you drive me,
    But that day will be too late.

    Submitted on 2010-01-16 07:57:01     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      Really strong words. The description of how things are 'carved' into your memory, i liked.
    Overall i think that you need not change anything.. and that the end of the poem is true - some day she will realize how she hurt you, and it will be too late to apologize.
    However, you mustn't let these things bug you.. don't even let it get to you. tell yourself, that you dont need her. and Yes, she has her own fears and suspicions. so don't dive into her remarks, don't snap .
    Keep it up
    | Posted on 2010-01-16 00:00:00 | by Little Gal | [ Reply to This ]

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