Codes of the Ninja
Ninji tend to send us codes of what they are planning to do to you; however, most humans simply cannot comprehend these messages with their feeble brains. Here are a few that we have taken the liberty to translate for you.
You "see" a Ninja somewhere = Prepare to die
A Ninja makes eye contact with you = Prepare to die
You are performing your daily routine like a good cyborg does = Prepare to die.
A ninja shakes your hand = Have a nice day... then you're going to die.
Other = Prepare to be mutilated (long, fancy way ninji say prepare to die)
You come home to find a ninja reading the paper and using your toilet = You can't knock on the freakin door? Prepare to die.
You see an innocent-looking old man walking toward you, desperately asking you for help = Run if you want, but he'll catch you up anyway. (Ninji usually disguise themselves as old men, which increases their cool factor)
A Ninja finds you playing Naruto: Rise of A Ninja = Prepare to Die and then the Ninja will beat the game in less then 4.34 seconds.
A Ninja flips you off = Same as above and below
You do NOT see a ninja = Prepare to die
If you don't know where a fart came from = prepare to die.
If you are a ninja = Prepare to kill someone.
You smell something horrible = Prepare to die, this ninja does not bathe
If a ninja sees you playing Ninja Gaiden on the Xbox 360 = Prepare to die multiple times, then the ninja will swiftly take your Xbox 360, as a trophy
You have seen a premonition = Prepare to die (freak accident involving a ninja)
A ninja takes you out for dinner = Prepare to dine in hell.
You write this sentence = prepare to d---
You attempt to speak with ninji with a "naruto" accent = prepare to die. Believe it!