Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: bordem first seriesdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: every48seconds
    ASL Info:    25/M/toronto
    Elite Ratio:    3.32 - 123/163/129
    Words: 239
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 769
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1490



    Description:
       i just wanted his here


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsbordem first seriesdots
    -------------------------------------------


    okay , so this is about, truly nothing to be honest
    simply a part of imagination that needs to become a reality
    so i believe i should right this down, whatever this may be
    this may be a letter, or a note
    or simply a awkward speech to oneself in order to pass the time,
    but none the less, this is something
    like all things, this is something
    that is undeniable
    To say this isn't real is naive, and quiet frankly rude
    no one is to judge existence something ,even this
    without first examining and judging themselves
    and that is something far beyond natural human ideal
    beyond our ideals...
    So what you may as is this about
    this is a simply writing
    or something in the attempts of wanting to be a writing
    stating that it, like many things
    things forgotten,lost,discarded
    or just hidden real well
    are still there , we're all still here
    and no it's not that we don't want to talk, but we want you to talk
    you to respond, you to state whats wrong
    whats right...whats left
    it's simple as that in truth
    open your eyes and you find life, and if not life
    then existence

    so as this comes to a close
    without any real meaning nor form
    recall that it is form, just free of comprehension
    and that my dear dear accumulation of atoms

    Is a beautiful thing




    Submitted on 2010-01-25 23:26:28     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      I love this! It makes the reader think and think hard which is something lacking from most thing anymore. I like the rambling trippy flow you had to it as well it was just different. Just clean up a lil of th gramatical stuff . . . though I wouldnt clean it all up cause its raw and adds a lil to the personality of the piece. Awsome piece, keep writing.

    sarah
    | Posted on 2010-01-26 00:00:00 | by S.A.M. | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    182309

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Unfortunate Reality written by TeslaKoyal
    Watch them Die written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Lunch written by HisNameIsNoMore
    4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore
    In My Head written by faideddarkness
    Our Cinder Crisis written by SavedDragon
    On Loop written by Daniel Barlow
    Faith In Line written by MyPeriodical
    May 31 2018 written by Chelebel
    The Search written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Wasps written by Wolfwatching
    Be Free written by hybridsongwrite
    Date night written by expiring_touch
    Skulls Beyond the Palisade written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Can't let my demons go written by faideddarkness
    By the bar written by expiring_touch
    Love Can Be... written by HAVENSMITH92
    Genesis written by saartha
    Hollow Points written by RequiemOfDreams
    Ten Poems written by Wolfwatching
    Dirge of Nostalgia written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Blood to Plowshares written by HisNameIsNoMore
    The First Time written by Wolfwatching
    It's been a while written by Sharati_hottie
    Stretto written by saartha
    A Fire! A Knife! A Black Crow Calls! written by HisNameIsNoMore
    All Time Low written by Janesaddiction
    Sunt Mala Quae Libas written by MyPeriodical
    In the end written by Janesaddiction
    On Top of a Water Wheel written by Wolfwatching

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry