Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: ideas of a girldots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: xxdellybooxx
    ASL Info:    17 female killaloe
    Elite Ratio:    1.34 - 1/4/5
    Words: 120
    Class/Type: Poetry/Depressed
    Total Views: 920
    Average Vote:    5.0000
    Bytes: 729



    Description:
       a place of mind change in a instant so be carefull


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsideas of a girldots
    -------------------------------------------


    she sits there quietly thinking to herself
    thinking of times when she wasnt afaird
    thinking of times when she didnt always cry
    thinking of times when nothing was in the way
    thinking of times when she didnt have to fake a smile
    thinking of times when she didnt feel dead inside
    thinking of ways to stop all this sorrow
    eg.killing/hurting herself
    but nothing even death could stop her pain
    she only wanted to change for him
    to change the way she felt
    to change what she had done
    to change what she had said
    to change everything that had happened
    tears fell her face as she quietly whispered

    "why me"




    Submitted on 2010-01-28 10:54:02     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      thanks so much i really appricate that
    | Posted on 2010-03-02 00:00:00 | by xxdellybooxx | [ Reply to This ]
      This is a great piece and has a good flow and rythem to it. I love the fact it has basic pattern through the first half and then in the middle and stop and turn point that doesnt fit the pattern and fads into a similar but different pattern in the words it gives a great mental picture of the emotion and mindset of the subject. I can relate to this as well. Powerfull piece, keep writing.

    Sarah
    | Posted on 2010-01-30 00:00:00 | by S.A.M. | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    182374

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Unfortunate Reality written by TeslaKoyal
    Giving written by jjd
    One Thing written by Wolfwatching
    To written by SavedDragon
    Once Again written by krs3332003
    Push written by JanePlane
    Hollow Points written by RequiemOfDreams
    4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Summer written by layDsayD
    102.3 written by rev.jpfadeproof
    The Promise written by annie0888
    Hopelessly Blind written by ForgottenGraves
    Deaf Dumb and Blind is no excuse written by poetotoe
    Date night written by expiring_touch
    To the King written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Bee Keeper written by endlessgame23
    Still Fighting See? written by ForgottenGraves
    Wasps written by Wolfwatching
    I will call out your name written by RisingSon
    Wavelength written by saartha
    Wish written by Daniel Barlow
    Fathoms of the Lullaby Sea written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Pressure written by hybridsongwrite
    Red Barn written by rev.jpfadeproof
    untitled written by Chelebel
    Song written by Daniel Barlow
    Love Can Be... written by HAVENSMITH92
    It's Night Now written by RisingSon
    To Glow written by krs3332003
    Be Free written by hybridsongwrite

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry