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    dots Submission Name: Pointlessdots

    Author: xxiknownowxx
    ASL Info:    16/F/GA
    Elite Ratio:    4.8 - 128/41/40
    Words: 212
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 521
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1340

       So, this is a pretty simple poem, (I think) but, it kind of just came out so I posted it. Opinions please. I知 just curious of what people think. It's not like I normally write. I was kind of experimenting. Tell me though, keep or throw out?

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.


    I知 a soul that never had a soul.
    An endless frame with a coulourless picture full of hate.
    I致e never had a second thought, let alone a first;
    Delightful without a taste.

    I知 a record player without a needle
    And a needle without thread.
    I知 a book, blank, with no pictures or writing,
    A body without a head.

    I知 a tree that has no roots or leaves,
    A pen without a spring.
    A hand without any fingers,
    Sand without a sea.

    I知 a can without an opener.
    Grass without green or brown.
    A shoe without a lace
    Music without any sound.

    I知 a scream without a mouth
    Emotions without love, fear, happiness or pain.
    I知 the legs that have passion to run a thousand miles,
    That will never run again.

    I知 a jacket with no skin to warm,
    Camouflage with nothing to hide.
    A child that can稚 be born,
    An opinion with no other sides.

    I知 a container without anything to contain,
    A thought without a brain.
    I知 the most famous to ever be known
    And you don稚 even know my name.

    I知 a shoe without a foot to hold,
    A foot without a heel.
    I am pointless.
    And pointless is how I feel.

    Submitted on 2010-01-28 13:23:52     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      WOW... you dont understand, you just literally made my heart leap....with what i dont know. this is one poem i could read a thousand times and still mule over. very nicely written, it makes you think.

    If i couldnt have my words, i would give away my eyes to see.

    | Posted on 2010-02-01 00:00:00 | by Magger32 | [ Reply to This ]
    Keep it.

    In a way this kind of writing is a good exercise I think -- because it makes you form thoughts in accordance to a certain concept and provides a way to sort of let your creativity wander.

    It is not a fantastic, mind-blowing poem -- but really, it doesn't need to be and I fully enjoyed the conclusions you came to.

    These lines are particularly succinct:

    I'm a record player without a needle
    And a needle without thread.

    -- in how you carried one image (the needle) over into a new image by the same name.

    And the whole poem is relating of non-relating. I found it enjoyable to read and it seems like it would be enjoyable, in a way, to write in this style. Though, obviously, the content is quite depressing. To be so empty.

    | Posted on 2010-01-28 00:00:00 | by Lady of Shalott | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
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    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

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