Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Pointlessdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: xxiknownowxx
    ASL Info:    16/F/GA
    Elite Ratio:    4.8 - 128/41/40
    Words: 212
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 408
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1340



    Description:
       So, this is a pretty simple poem, (I think) but, it kind of just came out so I posted it. Opinions please. I知 just curious of what people think. It's not like I normally write. I was kind of experimenting. Tell me though, keep or throw out?


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsPointlessdots
    -------------------------------------------


    I知 a soul that never had a soul.
    An endless frame with a coulourless picture full of hate.
    I致e never had a second thought, let alone a first;
    Delightful without a taste.

    I知 a record player without a needle
    And a needle without thread.
    I知 a book, blank, with no pictures or writing,
    A body without a head.

    I知 a tree that has no roots or leaves,
    A pen without a spring.
    A hand without any fingers,
    Sand without a sea.

    I知 a can without an opener.
    Grass without green or brown.
    A shoe without a lace
    Music without any sound.

    I知 a scream without a mouth
    Emotions without love, fear, happiness or pain.
    I知 the legs that have passion to run a thousand miles,
    That will never run again.

    I知 a jacket with no skin to warm,
    Camouflage with nothing to hide.
    A child that can稚 be born,
    An opinion with no other sides.

    I知 a container without anything to contain,
    A thought without a brain.
    I知 the most famous to ever be known
    And you don稚 even know my name.

    I知 a shoe without a foot to hold,
    A foot without a heel.
    I am pointless.
    And pointless is how I feel.




    Submitted on 2010-01-28 13:23:52     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      WOW... you dont understand, you just literally made my heart leap....with what i dont know. this is one poem i could read a thousand times and still mule over. very nicely written, it makes you think.

    If i couldnt have my words, i would give away my eyes to see.

    ~MAGGER
    | Posted on 2010-02-01 00:00:00 | by Magger32 | [ Reply to This ]
      
    Keep it.

    In a way this kind of writing is a good exercise I think -- because it makes you form thoughts in accordance to a certain concept and provides a way to sort of let your creativity wander.

    It is not a fantastic, mind-blowing poem -- but really, it doesn't need to be and I fully enjoyed the conclusions you came to.

    These lines are particularly succinct:

    I'm a record player without a needle
    And a needle without thread.


    -- in how you carried one image (the needle) over into a new image by the same name.

    And the whole poem is relating of non-relating. I found it enjoyable to read and it seems like it would be enjoyable, in a way, to write in this style. Though, obviously, the content is quite depressing. To be so empty.

    -Emeya
    | Posted on 2010-01-28 00:00:00 | by Lady of Shalott | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    182376

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Gaia written by endlessgame23
    going,,,"Skin." written by teika5
    Day 6 written by TheStillSilence
    (Untitled Song) written by TeslaKoyal
    Untitled written by Daniel Barlow
    FamiliarDemons ツゥ邃「 written by kyserin
    Loop-di-Loop written by endlessgame23
    Live In Between written by teika5
    Adoration written by TheStillSilence
    The World written by jjd
    Lie back & tan written by Daniel Barlow
    Ciggarettes written by Poetic_tragedy6
    A Worsening Effect written by Daniel Barlow
    Compartments written by TheStillSilence
    Meaningless Meanings written by ForgottenGraves
    Coversheets written by TheStillSilence
    // Seasonal Song written by ShadowParadox
    When Sirens Whisper written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Sword in the Water written by Wolfwatching
    A Sense Of Things written by Daniel Barlow
    Mystery Read written by kyserin
    Not the Devil, but the Wind written by endlessgame23
    In a Corner written by jeniecel
    Deep written by Janesaddiction
    Hyle written by endlessgame23
    A Thousand Reflections written by endlessgame23
    The Want written by Daniel Barlow
    Starseed written by endlessgame23
    Twin Intercept written by Daniel Barlow
    Verse: written by Daniel Barlow
    niel Barlow

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry