Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Donedots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: jackz
    ASL Info:    24/F/OH
    Elite Ratio:    3.76 - 591/623/381
    Words: 84
    Class/Type: Fanfic/Venting
    Total Views: 551
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 617



    Description:
       to my ex we were going to get married things feel apart seperated and then tried to make it work but its simply not meant to be


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsDonedots
    -------------------------------------------


    I'm done with your harassment
    I'm through with your over protective personality
    I'm getting rid of your jealous tendencies

    As the heavens above pour snow onto us,
    Your understanding for my absence is nonexistent
    Your childish behavior has worn me down to nothing
    Your demanding personality has only stripped me of everything I long for...

    Freedom,
    Understanding,
    Love...

    I am walking away from you,
    I'm not looking back,
    And I have no regrets,

    Nor will I ever have regrets.




    Submitted on 2010-02-08 21:00:51     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      The feelings expressed in this writing are beautiful and the use of listing is well thought out. I wonder if you need the final 'and' before the last line as it slows the reading at an uncomfortable point.
    Just a few spelling corrections though:

    1st stanza 2nd line: Threw > through

    1st stanza 3rd line: ride > rid

    2nd stanza 1st line: poor > pour

    2nd stanza 2nd line: your > Your
    | Posted on 2010-02-09 00:00:00 | by StarAcabar | [ Reply to This ]
      cathartic

    i would state... i feel connected by way of being on the end of the comments

    like that song by carly simon
    i'm so vain...
    i hate vanity...it gets so inclusive... like as soon as you invite one vain tendency in then later you need another and another and another until you are all that you can see...

    i think thats when people loose control and start swinging....
    i mean when Freedom Understanding and Love go on the defensive life might be better off over... and there has to be some thing some trait that fasts regret...
    | Posted on 2010-02-09 00:00:00 | by leocrates | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    182782

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Commencement written by Ramneet
    Instances written by hyproglo
    Tides of Man written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Can't let my demons go written by faideddarkness
    Lunch written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Stance written by Daniel Barlow
    Dirge of Nostalgia written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Stretto written by saartha
    I'm here written by BloodtornAngel
    Convergence written by HisNameIsNoMore
    The Search written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Wasps written by Wolfwatching
    Chasing The Lie written by jackz
    May 31 2018 written by Chelebel
    Aftermath and Waltz written by HisNameIsNoMore
    It's been a while written by Sharati_hottie
    Our Cinder Crisis written by SavedDragon
    ... written by Daniel Barlow
    The Last to Walk the Earth written by HisNameIsNoMore
    untitled written by Chelebel
    The First Time written by Wolfwatching
    Love and Solitaire written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Blood to Plowshares written by HisNameIsNoMore
    To the Epilogue written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Broken Promises written by S.A.M.
    Bam (Awash). written by Daniel Barlow
    Bam written by Daniel Barlow
    less is more written by Daniel Barlow
    Cage written by distortedcloud
    4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry