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    dots Submission Name: A Broken Vowdots

    Author: Mithrandir
    ASL Info:    28/m/N.Y.
    Elite Ratio:    4.62 - 452/681/113
    Words: 138
    Class/Type: Poetry/Depressed
    Total Views: 650
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 880

       I just wrote this in about 10 minutes about a friend of mine, who through ignorant eyes, seemingly has utter contempt for me, not knowing my actions were only because I cared. MAybe too much. I know the piece is rough but Im more or less posting it for venting quality. Some days I wish I could end emotion cut the strings....

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsA Broken Vowdots

    I called you brother
    Vowed to draw swords
    with you and no other

    Now you spit in my face
    as I run to fight
    at your side

    So many scars
    because I believed in you

    You gave the worst
    You’ve scarred my heart

    A reasonto break my vow

    Would have given my life for you
    Now I live to see you dead

    My brother is gone
    and your standing
    at the point of my sword

    I will not falter
    You know not my true skill
    Nor my heart

    Your blade shall break
    upon me as
    water against rock

    Your shield will splinter
    as you try to parry
    what I have to say

    I shall avenge you brother
    by killing the monster
    parading around in your skin

    Submitted on 2004-07-23 10:56:18     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      For writing it in less than ten minutes, this is wonderful. I think that you really put a lot more thought into it than you think you did, but if you can evoke emotions like this in a piece that's that full of contempt, then you definitely deserve a place of honor in any hall of fame. Good-great-write. -Archadya
    | Posted on 2004-09-28 00:00:00 | by Darc Archadya | [ Reply to This ]
      Wow, I loved this! It was harsh but i liked that. Usually you get people covering their anger with stupid metaphors and this spoke the truth, beautifully i might add. Great work!
    | Posted on 2004-07-23 00:00:00 | by Elegy | [ Reply to This ]
      Your pain and anger is evident and I feel for you (although I realize this was submitted months ago and I have no idea of the current situation). I can relate somewhat due to a short but intense friendship I had that ended rather badly. This is well written.
    | Posted on 2004-11-01 00:00:00 | by ber | [ Reply to This ]

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