Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: A Girl and The Snowdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Colten
    ASL Info:    19/Man?lol/U of I
    Elite Ratio:    3.05 - 62/99/43
    Words: 152
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 637
    Average Vote:    5.0000
    Bytes: 1004



    Description:
       A snowy night and a girl...it happens.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsA Girl and The Snowdots
    -------------------------------------------


    Last night I saw what she spoke of...
    A lamp-post, a light, and falling snow.
    Falling lightly, slowly in small illumination
    With darkness around, and there
    Above my head a small window of simplicity
    Of a lamp-post and comforting dust.

    She saw falling snow and liked it.
    And I saw the small illumination and dust.
    We saw different perspectives of one reality;
    For I realized, she wasn't watching the lamp
    Nor the window of lit snow, but she was
    Watching the snow itself.

    There was no light behind it
    Say that of street ambiance,
    No direct beam of illumination,
    She simply saw the snow, and she smiled.

    She talks to me more often, and I to her
    Though we are of different perspectives;
    I hope to know her better-for friend or more.
    There is at least one connecting factor...

    We both find Beauty in comforting dust.





    Submitted on 2010-02-24 13:00:08     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      I really like the image you gave here. I started reading it, and I was like, ok, good so far...

    But then when you compared your different views to different views of snow...I thought, magnificent!!!

    I LOVE this write.

    Truely magnificent.
    (I hope I spelt that right, haha)

    Faves list. And it takes a lot to get on mine.

    -Kali.
    | Posted on 2010-02-24 00:00:00 | by xxiknownowxx | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    183229

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Across the bed written by expiring_touch
    A bit of Pain written by teika5
    Dream written by closetpoet
    Coversheets written by TheStillSilence
    Delicious Stews written by elephantasia
    To the Artist written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Compartments written by TheStillSilence
    Lost Inside the Race written by ForgottenGraves
    going,,,"Skin." written by teika5
    In a Corner written by jeniecel
    Live In Between written by teika5
    Twin Intercept written by Daniel Barlow
    Meaningless Meanings written by ForgottenGraves
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth written by endlessgame23
    Ciggarettes written by Poetic_tragedy6
    A Sense Of Things written by Daniel Barlow
    (Untitled Song) written by TeslaKoyal
    Rooted in Nature written by Chelebel
    Not the Devil, but the Wind written by endlessgame23
    Day 5 written by TheStillSilence
    None the Wiser written by endlessgame23
    Things They (Don't) Say written by TheStillSilence
    The World written by jjd
    Keep written by TheStillSilence
    Hyle written by endlessgame23
    Deep written by Janesaddiction
    Gaia written by endlessgame23
    The Curtain Call written by faideddarkness
    A Worsening Effect written by Daniel Barlow
    Day 6 written by TheStillSilence

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry