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    dots Submission Name: Suppressiondots

    Author: einna
    ASL Info:    23/F
    Elite Ratio:    5.44 - 11/13/14
    Words: 63
    Class/Type: Poetry/Depressed
    Total Views: 598
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 419


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.


    Light falls on my moment of darkness
    Burning my flesh...
    Tears are reabsorbed into my skin
    To be cried out again...
    Dreams are forgotten in a restless nights' sleep
    To be lost in a world of realities...
    Hopes are spent in order to put a smile on
    And survive another day...
    Hours spent silencing feelings for another time
    Are never allowed to escape...

    Submitted on 2010-02-25 19:11:19     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

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    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      This is a good entry its bleak yet precise.. Leaves answers yet questions. It says to leave feed back more than compliments but there is nothing I would recommend changing about this write. I personally like the way it is. If you don't mind I would like to put you on my stalk list. I am anxious to read more of your writings.
    | Posted on 2010-05-26 00:00:00 | by Dragune | [ Reply to This ]
      The opening is most powerful as well as revealing. An endless cycle with perceptions flipped wherein the "light" of hope and/or some happiness is felt instead as a painful burn upon the entrenched darkness which might have evolved into a quiet recessive spot, an almost treasured mechanism to fully justify just hiding away while seeking an end to being wrenched around back and forth between the two so.

    This is quite possibly the best of its kind and most lovingly forlorn work of English language I have had the pleasure to read. So simple and yet so moving, it bleeds hopelessness while at the same time the very effort of such a creation is serving as the mechanism of the required release. That is to say, the work itself IS the escape, which captures the true irony as well as beauty.

    Yes, this needs to be shared with the rest of us and I'll have to fav this one. More?
    | Posted on 2010-02-26 00:00:00 | by Blue Monk | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

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