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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Ephidrene and Athiestsdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: all the english boys
    ASL Info:    15
    Elite Ratio:    2.76 - 173/239/46
    Words: 115
    Class/Type: Poetry/Dark
    Total Views: 880
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 782



    Description:
       writing again. man. i miss it


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsEphidrene and Athiestsdots
    -------------------------------------------


    ephidrene leaks from the upturned roots
    drizzle down into this open abrasion
    carry me to the church, leave me on the altar
    blood of a saint, shoes of a whore
    pearls bead on my forehead
    those diamonds unsettle in my stomach
    writhe around like maggots following a flickering inferno
    burning them alive inside my skin
    i was so awake, with adreneline thwarting my morals
    with this knife i can't feel in my own hand
    with this blood i can't quite cough up
    the tinted glass won't let me see the empty parking lot
    or you lying cold on the bathroom floor
    entrailsamongtheorganringingnotesflyingrippingatthe
    skin a holy reverance
    you let go of my hand
    goddamn you.




    Submitted on 2004-07-23 16:23:23     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      yeah i think you mean ephedrine- whooo, speed-yeahjumpingupanddownand...going...really...slow...now...
    it sounds like...a drug binge and...people falling apart, selfish and folding into themselves. i liked it.
    | Posted on 2004-07-23 00:00:00 | by lukewarm | [ Reply to This ]
      I really like this. You use a lot of good metaphors. It seems to me that you differing so much from diamonds to maggots and saint to whore, is because there are many different sides of you. You can be a saint or a whore. Whatever, it sounds great.
    | Posted on 2004-07-23 00:00:00 | by emo-tastic | [ Reply to This ]
      Forget those other comments, this sounds like a dark scrypture, a dark prayer...Eithrer to homicide or suicide, or both...Im not to sure, this was a great right, and it's so hard, and usually I write a lot of confusing dark poetry too that a lot of people aren't intrested, yet I did have a hard time understanding it...But overall I tried man to see what you were saying, and the word selections are right on...Really good work
    | Posted on 2004-07-23 00:00:00 | by Crestfallenman | [ Reply to This ]
      seems angry, i like it...almost reminds me of like a romeo and juliet kinda thing, cuz she's in the church or whatever and someone else is lying cold on the bathroom floor...i dunno, its kind of eerie. some of the images are kinda hard to grasp, like from diamonds to maggots, that sort of thing...but other than that i like. talk at ya later~april
    | Posted on 2004-07-23 00:00:00 | by leper messiah | [ Reply to This ]
      Slightly confusing for me... but I think I got it ^.^ I take it its a poem about... suicide or something along those lines... see look what you did! you got me all confrazzled!
    -Alli
    | Posted on 2004-07-23 00:00:00 | by Childoutspoken | [ Reply to This ]
      what is ephidrene? that's not in the dictionary, doll...maybe you mean ephedrine?ormaybeijustdon'tunderstandandshouldn'tbereadingthis... some other good words though...thwarting, reverance
    | Posted on 2004-07-23 00:00:00 | by Kristina9178 | [ Reply to This ]


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