You must so enjoy writing these poems! But I can't comment because I haven't the patience to work through each line with such strenuous atention. I'm a reader for poets who make it a bit easier for me.
I don't think this is a criticism and I hope you don't mind the comment.
Oh yeah, now that's what I am talking about! This combines the best of both worlds...
While your friends apparently digest upscale words, my own often seem to require things to be spelled out phonetically or at least they seem to appreciate that whether or not it is being accurately understood. They are more about emotion than intellect, rather primitive I'm afraid but extremely faithful in their own direction. If i have time I will spell this particular one out in such a "musical" manner, read it out loud as a treat and hope to not get bitten in their glee.