[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: Dear Frienddots

    Author: Segniust
    Elite Ratio:    8 - 74/33/8
    Words: 100
    Class/Type: Poetry/Longing
    Total Views: 1077
    Average Vote:    4.0000
    Bytes: 661

       To those who have had special friends out there. I hope you find them again.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsDear Frienddots

    Time has passed us by,
    And we've grown farther apart,
    But the age old friendship we had,
    Has never left my heart,

    I admit I've made mistakes,
    And my actions have been wrong,
    But I truley must confess,
    That I wish this wasn't so long,

    My eyes are on the clock,
    Counting every tiny second,
    And it seems like forever,
    Since the last time we've spoken,

    So I want to tell you now,
    Even if you don't think it's true,
    You'll always be a special friend,
    And I hope life goes well for you,

    Submitted on 2010-03-21 20:41:11     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      I love the subject, and can empathize on the feeling. So much is given to romantic love in poetry, that the platonic love two people can share is too often overlooked.

    As for the structure of the piece, the format is well laid out, but there are a few easily corrected mis-steps:

    In the third line of the second stanza(?) truly is misspelled and in the last line of the poem you put a comma instead of a period, leaving it open ended where it shouldn't be.


    | Posted on 2010-03-22 00:00:00 | by blu_kittin | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]