Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: to impress youdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: PopRocksRae
    ASL Info:    21/ F/ Heaven
    Elite Ratio:    2.49 - 232/369/355
    Words: 158
    Class/Type: Poetry/Being a Teen
    Total Views: 602
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 963



    Description:
       A story about a girl's crush. I've been through many times. I've had a chrush on this one guy who sat next to me in world history and he never noticed I was there. Ugh!

    "If it was supposed to be easy, they wouldn't call it a crush."
    -unknown-


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsto impress youdots
    -------------------------------------------


    I spend hours on my hair.
    My make-up just right.
    So when you past me in the halls
    I might be in your sight.

    I drench myself with candy perfume.
    and Put on my favorite heels.
    So when you see me heading towards you
    your mind begins to reel.

    I flip my hair over my shoulders.
    laugh at all your not-funny jokes.
    So if you were to notice me
    you're heart would begin to choke.

    I sit the closet to in science class.
    I'm right next to you in art.
    I borrowed your pencil once
    and you borrowed my heart.

    I walk down all the halls you do.
    I'm always one step behind.
    I keep waiting for you to turn and see me
    my face in your mind.

    But you walk in front and away.
    so I guess I'll folow like I do.
    I dress, act, wear everything right,
    just to impress you.




    Submitted on 2010-04-28 10:58:37     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Very cute! I think it captured the feeling very well. The only negative thing I have to say is that, I do think the flow was better at the beginning.
    | Posted on 2010-04-28 00:00:00 | by isis_lenore | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    184671

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry