Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Teddydots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: brokenbutterfly
    Elite Ratio:    1.62 - 0/0/1
    Words: 136
    Class/Type: Poetry/Death
    Total Views: 299
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 793



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsTeddydots
    -------------------------------------------


    The teddy bear sits in an empty room
    The teddy bear sits in dispear and gloom
    For the teddy's owner is now dead
    and all the teddy see's is crimson red

    Not red from anger nor from hate
    but red blood dripping from her beaten mate
    A little girl sweet and innocent
    in her eyes she had a shine a glint

    The teddy bear sits in a cold cold memory
    remembering the battle where her mate tried to flee
    the anger and rage coming from her dad
    who came home drunk mean and bad

    only the teddy knows what the girl would think
    she couldn't tell anyone else, but was over in a blink
    a life never able to start never able to live
    cause of a jealous man unable to give




    Submitted on 2010-05-21 03:09:10     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    185172

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry