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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: It's Funny You Still Think of Medots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: lebeauvide
    ASL Info:    24/F
    Elite Ratio:    2.29 - 75/295/165
    Words: 116
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 454
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 681



    Description:
       I find it humorous.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsIt's Funny You Still Think of Medots
    -------------------------------------------


    You see in me only the passage of time,
    A mile marker for the roads you have traveled.
    I am nothing to you anymore...
    Nothing but a forest of concrete and gravel.
     
    I am not a person to you, no-
    I am but a place you have been.
    You inhabited my soul, my very heart...
    But you will never be there again.
     
    My gasoline tears fuel your get away car,
    As you steer me out of control.
    I know, yes... I know-
    Never again will I be whole.

    I am constrained by my own rhymes,
    I am the victim of your device.
    I offered myself to you,
    And you burned me to the ground.




    Submitted on 2010-06-01 23:32:52     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Hi,

    I'm liking the metaphors with the getaway cars. The whole 'road' theme. It signals at a kind of 'highway' jibe, you know? And highways have a lot of connotations with them like "it's either my way or the highway" or like a place where you end up when you're trying to sort out your life etc...

    Except the second and fourth stanzas don't really comply with the metaphor as much as the other two stanzas, but they do describe in detail how you/this person felt.

    I can relate to this, in the sense of being used. As described in the poem.

    Anyway, this isn't much for a critique, but I thought I would offer my thoughts on this as I did indeed like it.

    And if you are writing from personal experience... it sucks, and I hope you have been able to get over what this person has done to you >.<

    Thanks for sharing (:

    --Esha
    | Posted on 2011-01-21 00:00:00 | by EshyFishy | [ Reply to This ]


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    185440

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


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