Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: The Realtordots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: wovenwords
    ASL Info:    19/F/Washington
    Elite Ratio:    2.46 - 108/303/189
    Words: 161
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 312
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1116



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsThe Realtordots
    -------------------------------------------


    We know sprawling lake views
    are your preference,
    bridges arching over a still sheet of cerulean,
    gazing out of wall-sized sixth floor windows
    at the high beams of the cars driving across
    like a bright string of Christmas lights,

    but we think you’ll find this
    acceptable, this look out across
    the grainy brown of suburban rooftops,
    out towards the sky where trees used to tower
    until they were cut down
    to make room for hundreds more rooftops.

    We know waking in the morning
    to tousled hair and soft low breaths
    is your preference,
    after falling asleep to piano
    ballads or the sound of a
    typewriter click-clacking frantically
    from across the room,

    but we think you’ll find this
    acceptable, this waking to
    screams of children and the low growl
    of various lawn mowers,
    a suburban symphony in its first movement,
    slowly crescendoing
    as emptiness begins
    clanging on its
    great guttural timpani.




    Submitted on 2010-06-08 23:49:37     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      How has no one commented on this, your writting efficiency is amazing, good vocabulary, and great visualizations even the title of the piece goes seamless.... BRAVO
    | Posted on 2010-06-10 00:00:00 | by lone_one | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    185553

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    excerpt from life written by Daniel Barlow
    Where I Want to Be written by riverrei
    Looking for Love written by riverrei
    Merry fuck you santa written by distortedcloud
    Only You written by riverrei
    The Ritual written by riverrei
    Struggles of an Addict written by riverrei
    The Truth written by riverrei
    The Black Within Me written by riverrei
    Living Dead written by Thenocturnal
    The Journey written by riverrei
    A farwell letter to a friend written by lynn7
    The Waiting Game written by riverrei
    Where Is My Lullaby? written by riverrei
    summer recital written by CrypticBard
    The Familiar written by riverrei
    The Bottle written by phil askew
    Blood im my Pen written by Passionbyapathy
    Life is Toxic written by Forgiven
    Strangers written by riverrei
    Vagrancy written by Wolfwatching
    Mirror written by expiring_touch
    lost something in the rain written by distortedcloud
    Software Malfunction Musings on a Karmic System written by Passionbyapathy
    Repressed Depression written by riverrei
    tie my hands written by distortedcloud
    Truth and Love written by riverrei
    Male sublimation written by expiring_touch
    Who Knew written by riverrei
    My Journey written by riverrei

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry