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    dots Submission Name: Love Hate Affairdots

    Author: xmeout
    Elite Ratio:    0.79 - 3/3/6
    Words: 917
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 779
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 5399


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsLove Hate Affairdots

    Do you expect me to believe in you?
    Tell me something about you reminds me
    I can't stand to look at you
    Something in your voice reminds me
    You never had anything to say
    You almost had me again
    I was fooled into thinking I'm alive
    You gave me something again
    In case I forgot how it felt to lose

    You let the words wash over you
    You take what you want, and leave me the rest
    Slap me and kiss me in the same movement
    Leaving me feeling like I lost something
    And you came off better in the exchange

    And I would have never believed it
    But I saw it on TV
    So it must be true
    You're a lie

    I didn't think you could be framed as such
    You look so out of place in your baseball cap
    But it keeps your hair out of your eyes
    And it reminds me why I fell in love with you

    Dance with me for a moment
    Let your thoughts drift with mine
    Let the music make me forget
    You're a lie

    The lighting doesn't suit you, so bright red
    In your soul, you're a powder blue, soft and peaceful
    With a burning fierceness in your light blue eyes
    Hidden in a shifting, bulletproof shell

    The world waits for you
    But you were never really mine
    So while I wait, I wait alone

    Lie to me again

    I think what I saw in you
    That reminded me of something in myself
    Was my reflection

    It's just another hazard
    Of staring too deeply into another's eyes
    I couldn't tell which one of us blinked

    I want to run away all over again
    I want to make it all go away
    I want to burn it from my mind

    But no, I love you.
    You bastard
    I can't burn you out of my mind
    Just another failure

    And in the moonlight, it all looked so real
    Your skin, your hair, the promises made
    Even though I knew you to be a lie
    Even though I knew not to believe the way you talked
    the cold logic in my mind never stood a chance

    'Promise You'll Never Leave me' a voice whispered in my ear
    And I should have said good bye then...
    But I was lonely, I was alone for so long
    it felt so good to deceive myself, if just for a moment
    And now... now I wish I never knew you at all
    Broken lives, broken promises, broken trusts

    And as I try to move on, I notice I too might be broken
    But I swear I can survive you
    And I walk away, down the long, windy road
    Strong, and sullen, and once again alone

    I hate you for ever daring to try to love me
    I hate you for making me believe I could be loved
    I hate you for making me see good in myself
    Whether it's true or not

    I polish up my ego, and keep it on display
    I take a peak at my soul, and rip off another piece
    Throw it away, and watch as it struggles to heal itself
    Somehow, I love to watch me suffer

    And so I find my comfort in the bottom of a bottle
    As I drink my self-prescribed medication
    Broken soul, Broken mind, Broken
    I swear I'm stronger then all that
    As I bend, once more, holding more then I can take
    Broken is the only word I fear

    And in the corner of my mind I see you
    Walking with the sunlight falling from your hair
    Walking through this world with a purpose
    And to you, it all matters

    I can't decide if I think you're a fool or I love you
    And I don't know if I care
    Either way, I don't want you anywhere near me
    In case you turn out to be contagious

    I keep my distance and start my walk
    I have nowhere to go but I want to get away
    Something about you hurts me
    And I want nothing to do with you

    There's a thin line between love and hate
    Loathing and desire, pleasure and pain
    And you sit on that line,
    Playing with the dirt of my soul

    If I could burn you out of my mind I would
    All the joy and all the suffering
    It would kill me, change me forever
    But I need the confusion less then I need the pain

    Something about me needs you
    And for that, I hate me

    And so I explode
    And so I fall apart
    And so I go to pieces
    And so I'm gone

    Leaving the tattered remains
    Of a soul no one wanted
    Cast about, bleeding on the floor for you
    Cast about, bleeding on the floor for me

    And maybe, as I walk away
    And maybe, as I step in the mess
    And maybe, as I look behind and smile
    And maybe, I never needed you after all

    But fuck it, you know I'll never leave
    And I'm just waiting for the day when I do
    I'm waiting for it to matter
    I'm waiting for it to matter to you

    I love you forever
    And I hate you forever
    And in the end
    There never was an us
    And we will always be

    Submitted on 2010-06-17 14:22:06     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      this took me a week to keep it broken to be able to go back n forth. this is my masterpiece for me, my biggest accomplishment.
    | Posted on 2010-06-18 00:00:00 | by xmeout | [ Reply to This ]
      I like the repetition, it drives home the duality of what you're trying to get across. Seems you're of two minds, and also that that is precisely how you feel comfortable, for like a tight rope, if you were to lean too far one way or the other, you would fall. Such is the nature of these things sometimes.
    | Posted on 2010-06-18 00:00:00 | by TechnoticQ | [ Reply to This ]

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