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    dots Submission Name: Cortex c. by ruejacobs 4-20-09dots

    Author: ruejacobs
    ASL Info:    39/feminazi/Gehenna
    Elite Ratio:    4.82 - 619/473/167
    Words: 177
    Class/Type: Poetry/Venting
    Total Views: 749
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1138

       ah, my boyfriend's pretty serpent counsel. how i sometimes envy him his optimism and jolly good fellow cheer. how i sometimes want to choke him because of the same...lol

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsCortex c. by ruejacobs 4-20-09dots

    Tell me why donít you
    How I should let it go.
    Point me towards nirvana
    Or shut the fuck up.
    Iíve been too long around
    Those smug lotus-eating bastards.
    Blank canvas, you say...
    Defy my programming?
    I wish it was you instead of me.
    How big is your soul, Buddha?
    Do you wish that, too?
    How magnanimous you are;
    How self-indulgent.
    I am not your inferior.
    This chip on my shoulder?
    This old thing?
    It kept me alive.
    If I didnít glance at that chip,
    Iíd not have looked over my shoulder,
    If I hadnít looked over my shoulder,
    I wouldnít have seen
    The knife the bullet the chainsaw ...
    I am not hopeful like you, no.
    To me hope is the kiss of death.
    Iíll double check it, thank-you,
    I like to be sure.
    I like my breath in my body
    And my body intact.
    You want me to feel ashamed for not trusting you?
    Stupid man
    Look elsewhere for adulation.
    If you live, youíre a threat.
    And Iíll trust you when youíre dead.

    Submitted on 2010-06-17 22:59:45     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      Haha! I really enjoyed reading this. Especially these lines: Point me towards nirvana / Or shut the fuck up. So true, I'm also getting tired of the smugness these newfags have. :D They act like everything is so pretty perfect and shiny and we ruin everything around us. This on a planet that has flesh eating bacteria on it. On a planet that has countless creatures that eat your flesh and drink your blood if they can and infest you with a million diseases. Did we teach hyenas to crush bones and eat the marrow inside? Even the whales in the oceans swim with their mouths wide open and ingest millions of living creatures every second and feast upon their energy. This is life on planet earth. And they want to teach me how to eat grass and act all cuddly with the trees. haha
    | Posted on 2016-10-21 00:00:00 | by Paradox | [ Reply to This ]
      Love it! Nothing more dangerous to my peace of mind than someone telling me to "calm down"!

    My favorite lines:
    Point me towards nirvana
    Or shut the fuck up.

    One of my best friends once told me, "I tried to become one with the universe, but it ended up just stressing me out, ya know? Just one more thing to check off my "to do" list!" It's funny, but also sad. Or at least it was sad for me, because I soooo related to what she was saying!

    I can see there is real anger here, and real fear of betrayal. I understand, all too well the trusty chip on the shoulder. How else would any of us women survive? Or any sensitive soul, for that matter. If we could "let it go", what would happen? Maybe we'd be so light we'd just float away. . .

    Nice work!
    | Posted on 2011-10-15 00:00:00 | by JanePlane | [ Reply to This ]
      But Mother, didn't you know because we were God's little gift to man? A second thought present? "In case you get bored, here I'll fashion you a toy, there...now you have something to worship and obey you. Sit woman Sit."

    Ugh. Men!
    | Posted on 2010-06-18 00:00:00 | by Carosuel | [ Reply to This ]
      This reminds me of me and my boyfriend in the morning. He is a die-hard morning person, and by the time I get up, he's raring to go. I'll be sitting there, cradling my morning coffee like it's some lost child and trying to brush the cobwebs from my brain; still shaking dreams off really, and he'll be chattering away about this and that... and I want to say "shut up with your cheery morning crap!" Really I'm just jealous that I can't get up in the morning and feel good. I haven't felt good in the morning for years.

    Yeah, but I think I know what you mean here. Ive been told before to always hold at least one grudge. Not in an unhealthy, all-consuming way, but it is true that anger is an excellent motivator, and that fear is necessary to discern. I know what you mean about the "chip on your shoulder" keeping you going. Like that saying that used to be on fridge magnets some years ago; "I can't relax: Tension is holding me together!"

    I have a similar viewpoint that hope is sort of like death. You wish the hope would just die so you can go on with life.

    I once had a boyfriend who I'm sure expected me to kiss the ground he walked on. I was young, so at first I sort of did, but things really blew up when I started figuring things out on my own. He'd say self-righteous things such as : "I only say something if it's IMPORTANT," (implying that I talk too much) or "I like to think I don't HAVE any problems" (accusing me of being a pessimist for admitting to problems, which I saw not as pessimism but realism). Really our two different viewpoints got us into trouble, and the relationship went out with a bang. I'm not saying that's what'll happen with you, but yeah, I can relate!


    | Posted on 2010-06-18 00:00:00 | by Soul-Hugger | [ Reply to This ]

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