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Getting past my past and getting on with my future.
I'll lay my head down
in the daylight
I'll dream of you and how things used to be
As the sun haunts my lucid visions
I'll think of shooting stars and maybe get
some sleep tonight
I'll be burning here under the sun
and my twisted mind
Thinking of you and how things used to be
I'll not wish
I'll not want
I'll not regret
I'll lay down in the sunlight
get some sleep tonight
As you haunt my dreams
With the little things...
You were my Valentine
said you'd always be mine
We traveled that old road together
to find new places and adventure
I'll lay those thoughts aside...
I'll get some sleep tonight.
Submitted on 2010-07-05 17:32:56
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This is going on my favourites list, I can totally relate.... Great work! xx
| Posted on 2010-07-11 00:00:00 | by
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I liked the use of repetition. I think it definitely worked for this. I don't understand what happened to cause the feeling but I get the restlessness from lack of sleep and mulling things over too much. keep up the good work.
| Posted on 2010-07-07 00:00:00 | by
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Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [
1. Be honest.
2. Try not to give only compliments.
3. How did it make you feel?
4. Why did it make you feel that way?
5. Which parts?
6. What distracted from the piece?
7. What was unclear?
8. What does it remind you of?
9. How could it be improved?
10. What would you have done differently?
11. What was your interpretation of it?
12. Does it feel original?
Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
It means a lot to them, as it does to you.
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