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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: love love love and heartbreakdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: concrete_rose
    ASL Info:    31/f/nc
    Elite Ratio:    2.59 - 43/52/34
    Words: 141
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 480
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 934



    Description:
       longing for someone


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotslove love love and heartbreakdots
    -------------------------------------------




    Wondering about you
    about where u stand right now,
    the anger and agitation in that voice,
    the violation those lips contributed,
    to breaking us down.

    Could you see tonight,
    out towards the sky,
    the same one staring blankly downwards,
    holding secrets masked by brillance,
    could you see tonight?

    Looking up into that room,
    that holds back so many souls,
    so easy to get there and be kept,
    oh they made you a prisoner!

    Missing those summer days past,
    getting to know each other in the dim lit places,
    where a life was made and a baby,
    wishing things were different this time,
    wishing to have that back again.

    Remembering looking at us in our bed,
    in memories that are vivid,
    now the days are so cold,
    when i want to hold you close to me.




    Submitted on 2010-07-21 01:13:05     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      hey carrie thx for the comment and yeah a new life and a baby is a little redundant guess didnt read over thx
    | Posted on 2011-02-17 00:00:00 | by concrete_rose | [ Reply to This ]
      A few little nitpicks, u should be y-o-u. i should be I.
    And a little confusion on the line "where a life was made and a baby," a bit redundant?

    Other than that, I agree with sandman, a wonderful tribute to someone in a passing moment of your life.

    -Carrie:)
    | Posted on 2010-07-28 00:00:00 | by Carosuel | [ Reply to This ]
      hey that was nice a tribute to someone soecial or just the wanting of a passing moment
    either way nice read
    sandman
    | Posted on 2010-07-23 00:00:00 | by sandman | [ Reply to This ]


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