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Faded ink stains

Author: grimmreaper
Elite Ratio:    8 - 122 /43 /23
Words: 629
Class/Type: Poetry /Depressed
Total Views: 947
Average Vote:    5.0000
Bytes: 4292



Faded ink stains

I was the first one
that tried to die.

But for some reason
you where there.

I don't know why.
I don't even know how.

Because I never told you
my plan

all I did that day.
Was tell you goodbye

over our phone
conversation. heard it
in my voice.

Or maybe it was when
I confessed I loved you.

Maybe it was chance
or maybe


Maybe, you just knew
like you knew everything

else there was to know
about me.

But either way
you where there.

You held me in your arms
and you cried.

You told me,
not to give up

You told me
not to let go.

You said without me
You couldn't live
I remember
how sad I felt

when I heard
your voice break.

I wanted to comfort you
to tell you

that it was okay
for me to go.

That the world
was much better off.

the pain peter.

The pain was too much.
The pain in my head.

It just never went away.
No matter what I tried.

It was like
it was eating me up inside.

To the point
where there was nothing left

I can only starve my self

For so long.
So why Peter

Why couldn't you
just have let me go.

Why couldn't you
have let me be free

from the pain
inside my thoughts

Why did you make me promise
that day in the hospital

To fight no matter what
to keep going no matter what

Why did you give me false hope
only so to reach this point.

I tried to kill my self first.

And I failed....
Because of you Peter.

I tried to let go.
To leave the pain.

But you showed up
and bound my wrist

And you waited
by my side

tell they arrived.
And even than

You where there
in the waiting room.

for me to make it.

And now Peter
I am in the waiting room

for Only God knows what.

Waiting for them to come
and tell us

that you didn't make it.
To tell us, that you are gone.

Gone from my side.
Gone from my life.

Why Peter.
Why did you do it.

Didn't you realize
that when you pulled the trigger

You wouldn't only kill
your self

but you would
kill me too?

Don't you see
that I am died now too?

You made me promise.
Promise to never give up

Despite what happened.
All for what

So I can watch you
give up.

So I can be here
helping your mother

plan your funeral.
So I

Can stand here
in the pouring rain

Hearing your mother
wail her heart out

as they bury you
in the ground

Six feet
away from her heart

I guess you weren't
so strong after all.

I guess you where a lair
when you told me,, you loved me.

Because it you loved me
I wouldn't

have to travel sixteen miles
to visit your grave sight.

I wouldn't have
to bear the pain

Of you no longer
being here.

I will never forgive you

For letting me give you
my heart.

and like faded ink stains
your absence will for ever be

unwashable and unforgivable

Submitted on 2010-07-28 20:33:08     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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  This... brought tears to my eyes. It is a very emotional piece. I... too just recently lost a friend to suicide... How hard it is, to keep going. But we must! There is always another day, another chance, a new beginning. My condolences... <3
| Posted on 2011-01-20 00:00:00 | by ShadowsnLights | [ Reply to This ]
  Wow-blown away! This very well written and very powerful-i am sorry if this is something you experienced personally-words are not enough to express my condolences.

This poem expresses well the questions, confusion and grief that any person would be left with after losing someone that way.

I have no suggestions because i like it raw and as is. stormy
| Posted on 2010-07-29 00:00:00 | by stormyskies | [ Reply to This ]

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