[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: A Nonsense on Marleberry Streetdots

    Author: isselman2001
    Elite Ratio:    5.38 - 37/47/46
    Words: 162
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 703
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1010


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsA Nonsense on Marleberry Streetdots

    Where the doom hits the ocean at a quarter to two
    And the drunks in the bars drink their honeydew
    There the day swells with petty familiar threads
    Overlooking the seagulls and under the beds
    They are burried in bees and the passions of kings
    And philosophers overphilosophize things
    And the oceans of grayness and sound there are heard
    And the passions of gods and of things quite absurd
    And the feelings of nothing and the crying of space
    In a world in which all but the pure have a place
    All is geniune
    All is clear and sincere
    And the graves and the graveyards and headstones are near
    And behold! There the light of the white comes to die
    And the fears and the hopes of the hopeless run high
    There the skyscrapers scraping the fog touch the sky
    And the gloomy distorted deceptions are nigh
    Lying on old familiar beds where the hospitals die
    And the kindred familial tendencies lie.

    Submitted on 2010-08-04 05:08:14     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      I dig that street!

    This verseform is delightful, sophisticated, and it seems careless sometimes when the rhythm shifts - but there's a way to read every line out loud without tripping! I guess you do that on purpose; and if so, it is certainly clever and successful.

    On analysis, this poem is built like a sonnet except with 19 lines. Lots of poets make short poems that are like sonnets; I think it's sort of a natural process! You can usually cut up a sonnet into three stanzas all different - well, with 19 lines I found many ways to make it into 3 or 4 stanzas.

    Maybe an analytical comment isn't a lot of use really - it's more use to me! But this is a cool poem.
    | Posted on 2010-08-04 00:00:00 | by Glen Bowman | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]