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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Look At Thisdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: BlazeFlamme
    ASL Info:    22/m/TX
    Elite Ratio:    1.81 - 23/160/138
    Words: 201
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 325
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1242



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsLook At Thisdots
    -------------------------------------------


    This is my sign of distress
    This is my lack of success
    But every once in awhile
    I can still force a smile
    After all the memories I repress

    This is my fruitless attempt
    This is my deserved judgement
    Because I have not always done right
    Though I would were you here tonight
    Silhouette of karma That I resent

    This is my sacred place
    This is my sun-scarred face
    When you spend too much time in bliss
    Be driven insane by the things you miss
    As they're snatched from under without a trace

    This is my sigh of regret
    This is my try to reset
    But it doesn't matter what you dream
    Things never end up what they seem
    I'd never give back the day that we met

    This is my place filled with doubt
    This is my giving up shout
    The feeling will come and it will go
    As I lose my mind, I just don't know
    I can no longer seem to figure you out

    This is my deep goodnight kiss
    This is my relentlessness this
    I don't know what to do
    I feel so lost without you
    You're always everything that I miss




    Submitted on 2010-08-28 07:37:27     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      "She came in through the bathroom window"

    OK, this reminded me of a Beatles tune in a nice sort of way. Maybe that and a little Dr. Seuss, also a nice sort. All in all I enjoyed it.
    | Posted on 2010-08-28 00:00:00 | by Blue Monk | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

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    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
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    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



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