Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: My Weaknessdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: KindredSpirit
    ASL Info:    20, Male, Burlington Iowa
    Elite Ratio:    2 - 54/139/173
    Words: 201
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 376
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1264



    Description:
       I hate this feeling inside. And she's a liar and a cheat. I know her all too well. But I still can't find it in me to leave. For I love her.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsMy Weaknessdots
    -------------------------------------------


    At my weakest I find you comforting.
    I let you tell your lies.
    I let you believe that I trust in you.
    But the truth is in your eyes.
    I say what you wish to hear.
    Teetering on the brink of insanity.
    But at night it hits me,
    Like some catastrophic calamity.

    My memories playback in my mind.
    Haunting me with they're presence.
    And through all of this bullshit,
    You'd thought I'd learned my lesson.
    So it must be the simple fact,
    That this is no mere fascination.
    More so that you're a drug,
    And you are my addiction.

    I keep playing your game,
    Knowing it will never stop.
    And I grow weary of it all,
    Sooner or later I will drop.
    I know you sense the end.
    I know you feel the finish.
    And eventually I'll give up.
    These feelings are beginning to diminish.

    If you at all cared,
    Then you wouldn't pull this shit.
    You would be anxious to learn,
    Instead of letting me fall into this pit.
    But I have to say the truth.
    And that is I love you.
    If it were a lie I wouldn't be here,
    So it must be true.




    Submitted on 2010-09-15 01:05:41     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Good description, I like how you described the weakness. The words flow through the single feeling, weakness is actually what we make of it, and yet your poem sounds like a curse a curse that could ultimately bring forth an end. I like it because it brings a tear to my eye.
    | Posted on 2010-09-15 00:00:00 | by 13thprotector | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    187036

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    no sky on the other side written by teika5
    None the Wiser written by endlessgame23
    Gaia written by endlessgame23
    Untitled written by Daniel Barlow
    Dream written by closetpoet
    A Worsening Effect written by Daniel Barlow
    Meaningless Meanings written by ForgottenGraves
    Honeymoon written by TheStillSilence
    Compartments written by TheStillSilence
    Not the Devil, but the Wind written by endlessgame23
    Verse: written by Daniel Barlow
    Sword in the Water written by Wolfwatching
    Ciggarettes written by Poetic_tragedy6
    Deep written by Janesaddiction
    Johnny's Cock written by endlessgame23
    Lost Inside the Race written by ForgottenGraves
    Relentless. The Visceral Fracture. written by Daniel Barlow
    Starseed written by endlessgame23
    The Curtain Call written by faideddarkness
    Beauty Rest written by jackz
    untitled written by Outlaw
    Loop-di-Loop written by endlessgame23
    In a Corner written by jeniecel
    When Sirens Whisper written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Things They (Don't) Say written by TheStillSilence
    Coversheets written by TheStillSilence
    Lie back & tan written by Daniel Barlow
    Adoration written by TheStillSilence
    Live In Between written by teika5
    Florida's Autumn Solstice written by closetpoet

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry