We shouldn’t do this, Aurora whispers to him.
There are two figures standing in an alley, where the light does not hit them. It is twenty degrees outside but still they stand in the darkness. Their bodies spontaneously combusting from the heat they are producing do not notice the frigid airs hitting their faces.
His hands reach over her warm face. He feels the heat radiating from her body. He catches it in between his fingers. The heat seeping inside his skin, his veins, spreading like a virus. He is consumed with her heat, and he is hungry for more.
I need this, Federico replies back.
Locks of her hair are caught in his hands as he brushes them away from her face. Darkness blankets over her face, sheltering it from his ravenous eyes. Her hazel eyes are the only things he is able to clearly see. They flash at him dangerously. He steps back.
I want you, she says. She pulls him closer to him. She presses his hand to her chest, where her heart beats madly inside its cage. It is like a wild beast. He cannot resist her silk soft skin. He pushes her face closer to his. He could taste peaches. Every inch of her mouth tastes like that delicious fruit. Her body pressed close to him. He is going mad.
She pulls away, her breath raggedy and uneven, runs away. She runs even though the wind is blowing her to him. She fights the wind all the way home. As soon as she gets home, she locks her door three times, closes every curtain, but opens her bedroom window. She needs to have cold hair infiltrate her room. She cannot have the heat from inside consume her. She cannot be consumed. So, she bites her lips until blood is drawn. But she cannot taste it at this point she is already numb. She is too numb and cold to feel anything. She falls asleep to the howling of the wind.
- ~ -
The next morning she wakes up to the sound of her phone blaring and her cat, Bass, purring at her feet. She feel as if she woke up hangover even though, she had nothing to drink yesterday. Her head is throbbing and light is bothering her eyes. She lets her phone ring for three more times before she answers it.
Hello, she answers.
Aurora, al fin contestas! the voice on the other end replies back. The voice, too loud and energetic for her.
Diana, it’s only eight am, what’s the rush? she asks.
I have been calling you all morning since six am, the voice sounds exasperated, I just wanted to make you sure you have not forgotten that my wedding starts in two hours. You are one of the bridesmaids, after all!
Aurora slaps her forehead, shakes up Bass from her feet, and walks toward the bathroom.
Of course not. I have not forgotten. I’ll be there in thirty minutes top.
Do you need dad to pick you up?
Uh… yeah sure tell dad to pick me up.
Okay good he is on his way. He will be there in ten minutes.
Okay see you.
She hangs up on her sister, brushes her teeth quickly, and closes her bedroom window. She debates between showering here or at her sister’s place. Screw it. She will take her stuff over there. She packs everything in her red book bag. She pulls on some dark jeans and wife beater and pulls a sweater on and boots. She looks at the clock, she has three minutes to spare. She puts food on Bass’ food plate and water. There! One minute to spare.
Exactly, one minute later, her dad calls her to announce his arrival.
She runs downstairs.
Hi Dad, is Di mad that I’m late? She kisses her father’s cheek. Every day, his face feels more wrinkled.
Buenos Dias Aurora. Your sister is livid but not as furious as your mami. You know how they both get. Don’t pay attention. They’ll fuss about it for a while and then forget, and fuss more about the wedding.
The wedding came in no time, just last year, they got engaged.
Yes, yes even with a year worth of preparation, your sister and mami think they didn’t have enough time to prepare everything. They are running around like two chickens without their heads.
Aurora giggles. She wants everything perfect, you know Diana. And mami, she just wants to make everything perfect for her.
I know but they’re going to drive me crazy. I’m glad you’re coming. You know how to keep your head on your shoulders.
Ah, problems in Auroraland?
There are always problems, papi, but not today. Today is Diana’s day.
Okay but you know I’m here, if you need to talk.
They pull up at a beautiful white house with red shutters. The grass is the greenest Aurora has ever seen someone’s lawn. This is a good sign. She says to herself as she walks to the front door.
The moment she steps in, she feels her throat clog. She feels her insides become gelatin and her head throb more. She does not want to be here. She would rather take the next plane out of this city.
She did not forget her sister’s wedding. How could she? This is the day she has dread the most in her whole life.
She knocks inside her sister and future husband’s room.
Who is it? Her sister asks.
It’s me. Di, open up.
The door creaks open. She steps in and she sees her sister, the most beautiful she has ever seen her. Her throat clenches. She could see why he is going to marry her. She looks so innocent and beautiful in her custom made white dress. Aurora forces a smile.
Don’t just stand there, start getting dress! her mother reels her in and shuts the door. She hugs her. Have you been eating right? You look a little pale? Are you sick?
Ma! Please, don’t annoy her; Diana comes to her sister’s side. Nice of you to finally come, she whispers to her.
Aurora walks toward the king-sized bed, where her dress is lay out. It is a dark purple, heart shaped, long gown.
Where are the other bridesmaids? Aurora asks.
Two of them are downstairs getting ready, and one of them is coming in fifteen minutes ready. You’re the only one who needs to hurry up. her mom answers.
I’m going to use your bathroom, Di. Aurora walks into the bathroom and begins to undress as she gets ready for a quick shower.
Hurry up, she hears Diana yell from the door next door.
It takes her about twenty minutes to get dressed. She still needs to blow dry her hair. She looks at the clock; it is twenty minutes to nine. It will not take long to do her hair, since she has a pixie haircut. However, she will take about fifteen minutes to do her make up. She borrows some of her sister’s make up. Her eyes stand out more.
I always envied your eyes, Aurora, Diana confesses. They are so big and gorgeous.
Di, you have beautiful eyes. Your always look fierce and today they are full of joy.
Because I am happy, Aurora, I’m so happy. He makes me incredibly happy. I love him. she smiles at her sister.
I’m happy for you, baby sis.
Hey, I’m only two years younger than you.
Aurora squeezes her sister’s hands. Good luck, Di.
- ~ -
Aurora stands at the altar, along with four other bridesmaids and a maid of honor. On the other side of the altar are the groom, the best man, and four other groomsmen. She is trying not to look at the man who will be her sister’s husband but she keeps stealing glances as they wait for the bride to arrive.
A few moments later, the bride arrives with both their mother and father at her side as they walk down the aisle. Diana looks so radiant and beautiful as she walks down the aisle. The groom smiles down at his wife-to-be. His face twitches a little; his smile is not a hundred percent genuine. He looks at the woman who he dated for five years before deciding upon this decision. He was sure he was ready. He was sure she was the one. How come he does not feel so sure right now? He hugs her father and mother before he reaches for her hand.
You are gorgeous, he whispers in her ear as they kneel in front of the priest. The ceremony has commenced.
- ~ -
I do, Diana Quijada declares to her future husband.
And you, Federico de los Rios take Diana Quijada to be your lawful wedded wife? the priests poses the question to the groom.
He inhales deeply and replies back, I do.
And now I pronounce you husband and wife. You may now kiss.
Diana wraps her arms around her husband’s neck and kisses him deeply and in love. Her kisses burn him inside. Through his eyelashes, he watches Aurora’s smile falter. He is the only who notice her smile fade for a couple of seconds. He wants to reach over to her and console her. But how can he? He is the one who has caused her heart to stop for a moment. He is responsible for the pain and the events that will occur.
He can hear people cheer for them as they walk down the aisle as a married couple. He could see Diana’s mother grab onto Aurora. They are both hugging each other for support. Dona Blanca, she wails for the loss of a child. Aurora silently cries, her tears cradling on her mouth. Everyone thinks they are happy tears for her sister but, in fact, these tears are for her. She cries because she will never love another man.
He could feel hands grabbing on to him, patting him on the back, hugging him, congratulating him for marrying Diana. Finally! Everyone tells him. Finally, you both get hitched.
- ~ -
Later that night, the now married couple, alone in their own bedroom awaits their first night as husband and wife. Diana comes out of the bathroom, naked and bare. Her skin is glowing from so much joy. Her hair is smooth and covering her bare breasts. Pubic hair embeds her womanly parts.
It is you and I, today and forever, she says as she walks toward her husband.
He looks at her with curiosity. He has seen her naked before but tonight, it’s like the first time he has ever seen her. Her face looks younger for some reason. Maybe is the way she is looking at him. Her eyes are soft. She looks so beautiful, so untouchable. He could see her chest rise up and down as she closes in. She places his hand on her chest. He could feel her heart bounce up and down. She is anxious.
I love you, she says. Please take me. I am all yours.
She leans toward his mouth and begins to kiss him. Her kisses are short and static. He can feel her fervor. He kisses her back, closing his eyes, his thoughts scrambled inside his head. She begins to undress him. He pulls her underneath her and bathes in her perfume. He wants to make sense of his thoughts. He knows he should love her. He knows he should be happy to be with her. Finally, she is all yours. But, he cannot.
He does not feel happy as he penetrates inside, her mouth gasping for air, her vocal chords screaming. He feels nothing as he releases himself inside of her. He kisses her on the forehead and walks off to the bathroom for a cold shower. He leaves her in utter bewilderment and shame.
His thoughts are on the reception. In his mind, he draws the details from what happened today. He sees Aurora, looking beautiful as ever before on her bridesmaid dress. She no longer had make up on her eyes because the tears washed it away. Still, she looked beautiful. She was just sitting there, drinking, laughing with other men. Her laughter almost magical. His throat clenched as he watched her with them. He wished it was him, she was talking to. He wanted to steal her from them, but he could not. After all, he had just married her sister. Instead, he kept stealing glances at her direction throughout the night. He watched her dance with the same man three times. Her head lying on his chest on the last song. His stomach turned, his insides pulled inside of him.
Then, when it was time for her to depart, she had come up to them. She had hugged her sister and wished her luck. She was about to leave without hugging him, but then Diana had encouraged her to hug him. He is your brother, now. Aurora glanced at him and he could feel her heat, this time it was uninviting. She hugged him as she wished him luck. He did not want to let go of her. Every inch of him wanted her. But she pulled away abruptly, leaving him breathless.
He watched her walk away with the man she danced with. He drowned on his champagne glass. And now he is drowning on cold water. He wants to let the water cleanse him from his sinful thoughts. Instead, he begins to cry and pound his hands at the shower walls. He is damned.
- ~ -
Everyone goes to weddings to fuck the bridesmaid, Aurora tells Rafael.
Rafael kisses her thin shoulder, where bones become blades almost ripping through her skin. I don’t want to fuck you. I want to make love to you.
You have the soul of a poet, love.
I am only but a romantic and a writer.
Ah but of course, a writer! She smiles, her red lips looking mesmerizing.
Rafael undrapes her. The dress falls down at her feet, forming a puddle. It looks almost like dried blood. He stares at her body, her breast bountiful and round, her waist small and her hips only one fraction bigger than her waist. Her vagina is full of hairs.
I’ve always loved vaginas with hairs. I hate shaved vaginas, they look like little girls.
He strokes her pubic hair as he kisses her navel. He starts kissing her upward. Her breast, her chest, her shoulders, her neck, her ears, her lips, her cheeks, her eyelids, her forehead.
You were more beautiful than the bride herself, he tells her.
I am sure that’s what you tell every bridesmaid, she says coolly.
Rafael shakes his head but says nothing back. Instead, he begins to kiss her softly on her lips. She feels like he kisses her for hours. His kisses are so patient. His kisses are hot. He is making her want him. He is making her want to fuck him. He is making her forget for at least the time being her heart is broken.
Fuck me, she pleads. Fuck me! Fuck me!
I told you, I am not here to fuck you.
Okay, okay, make love to me. Just do it, please, quickly.
She pushes his hand down to her vagina and presses it hard.
Please, do it quickly, she begs him.
So, he does until dawn. He does until her body is sore and tangled up. They make love all night.
When they are done, he falls asleep on her bed. She goes to the shower and begins to cry because it did not work. She still remembers her heart is broken.